countdown to suicide year.

well,the holidays are at an end. i would love to say finally, but i cant.
only because i have not finished my homework.
but other than that, i'm pretty glad its OVER, i got so bored that i carved a chunk of plaster that fell of the ceiling into a paper weight, and i changed the pattern of my scotch tape, i dont like plaids, not that particular design anyway.
but there are good things for me next year (even if its PMR)... like...
hold on i'm still thinking...
nothing.
oh wait!!!
my mum redid my study room!!! it now has corner shelves and it stretches almost all the way to the ceiling, i have now more space than books (for the first time ever)
but there was some trouble with one of the corner shelf (which happens to be a CD rack ) it was not stable and kept leaning backwards, my mum told me to stuff something behind so that it wont move anymore...
and being me, i stuffed all of the boxes used to package the bookshelves before and stuffed em' behind there (now thats what i call recycling!)
and next month my mum's getting me an aircond (which is a big deal) since i have not been allowed an air cond before cuz my mum says it builds character and so on and so forth, and told me her life story before i dropped it.
my mum has finally decided to put the AC in my study room cuz before i never actually sat in it and studied (not even in UPSR year, which was why i was so suprised that i got all A's and tricked my uncle into forking 500 bucks)
so my mum did all this to make sure i studied in my study room.
she spent a lot of money redoing it, which is why i am now starting to take my mum's threat of marrying me off if i did not do fantastic for my PMR...

and i'm here screaming "SHIT!!!! I ACTUALLY HAVE TO STUDY THIS TIME!!!"

and speaking of my study room, my mum and grand dad just came back from ikea after dashing in and dashing out for 3hours.

today is sunday and my grandad came back from IKEA shocked thast it is packed so late in the afternoon... hehe, he still ahs a lot to learn about woman and IKEA.
men, they never learn. i remember him saying "alah, dah petang dah, semua org dah balik "
yeah right!

so i now have no books to read, so one night my mum came into my room and caught me reading "in the fifth at Malory Towers" by Enid Blyton and laughed out loud or lol.
she apparently found it funny that a girl who has read the da vinci code, angel's and demon's, pride and prejudice, loves Trudi Canavan would be stuck reading Enid Blyton
yeah, HAHA very funny!
thats the price you pay for having a nice studyroom and floor to almost ceiling book shelf...
no books... ironic no?
as it is my mum promised a suficient decrease of my book intake and suficient increase in my tuition next year, i have no books to read this year.
Boo Hoo.
oh yeah, i'm also gonna cut my hair short so i dont have to bother with it next year (its so bloody anoying) but i have yet to actually CUT it yet, i've been waiting 4 almost a month.. i waited 2 month for the first hair cut...
i wonder how long i have to wait for this one.
but i am absolutely determined to make my hair look as if Edward Scissorhand did a number on my hair. in order not to have any distractions next year...
yeah i know i know, i being a teen girl in the 21st century, should not want to look ugly.
but i have always been weird (its only called accentric if you're rich) other girls go shopping, i go camping on an island near Pinang. go figure.
anyway, i gotta go, my still amazed grandad, my grandma and my mum are contemplating wheter my granma's kuih bakar is basi or not, they asked me to sniff it and not suprisingly, i could not smell it due to my nose that is acting like a leaky pipe, unfortunately, my nose cant be fixed by twisting it with spanar. unfortunately.

beauty beauty on the wall, who is the stupidest of them all?

so i was stuck in Kajang (again) and (as usual) i watched tv and laughed.
i turned on WHI (wanita hari ini) and laughed... they have beauty products called "cintaku acne" ...
right, my love acne... perfect name for a cream designed to BANISH acne... go figure, them there are products like ass firmers.... what is it? the gym??? nope, its a cream that burns your tush when you put it on, then they have whitening powder for medium to dark skinned ppl who want white radiant skin, weird thing is, the colour of the powder itself is not for dark toned ppl... so you look like a theater actress!!! so before you become white you have to wear powder that looks like powder?
i thought that when you wear make up you wanna look beautiful... not like the phantom of the opera?
so then a bride segment came on and i found out that the trend for bride's nowdays is natural...
then i look at the models and i see an inch of powder on their face which is obviously whiter than thair necks, lips dat beat Mulan's wen she was gonna meet her matchmaker at the start of the film and cheeks that looked as if someone slapped them a thousand times over on each cheek?
if that's natural, then all the rest of us must look like clowns!!!

anyway, i'm stuck in holiday blues...i'm bored i miss my friends!!!
ash,aazraa,faz,nani,alia,sucjita,denise,vanilla,nicole,harshiah,sue jinn,debs and the whole family!!!
cnt wait to go back even through the teachers are badx10 and i have to meet the seniors... plus i dont know if i wanna try out for a school team next year, i'm thinking olahrga or chess, cnt decide.
and i'm thinking of going 4 club interact but my mum said no... i dont know why she wont give me a straight answer. so the other choice is malay Drama club... i dont mind the drama...its just the malay part dat bothers me. and the rest of hte choices are crap.
buh bye.

finaly i have seen Twilight

so i finally watched Twilight!!!
with my mum
yeah i know, sad, a waste of sweet movies i tell ya!!!
but it was worth it, i finally managed to make my mum like a guy.
but...
there is a problem
this is what she said "ooohhh, one thing i know is that i am DEFINITELY marrying a Vampire"
yup, my mum has found what she likes, unfortunately, its the wrong species,state of well-being, and ...interests.
my mum always said guys are only interested in one thing... yeah right!
i'm sure Vamps have the same... INTERESTS as everyone else (everyone else who drinks blood that is)
so anyway,
we went to one utama to watch a movie, but we came back (being as female as we are) with a movie,5 photo albums,2 baking pans,1 jelly mold and a gift wrapper (i collect those) but only the ones with nice paterns.
so, despite what it may seem, me and my mum ARE female.
talking about females, most of us mature faster than guys (yeah!!! you guys argue you are stronger than woman anatomicaly right? well, god created everything in balance, fe has he, black has white, good means theres evil, so if a guy is stronger than a female, the law of the universe proves that females are SMARTER than men, so thats why it is balanced).
to prove it, my cousin (or cow sin as i think of them when they start being prats) has a friend (a girl) who's boyfriend is a girl... did i mention my cousin is eight years-old?
yeah, i guess the guys couldn't catch up so the two girls decided to get CAUGHT UP in things they dont understand. my cousin has no idea about her friend's preferences (look, i dont mind gay people, in fact i love gay guys!!! and i go to an all girls school, which means i walk past lesbians without realizing it, and even if i do, i dont treat them any differently) i am just scared that my cousin will be one, i dont mind, but my grandma is 71 years-old. do the math.

anyway i gotta go my facebook is calling (well thats the story anyway, i'm dry out of things to say)

soffar sogood

last Thursday, i went to see this movie entitled, 'los and faun'
an Afdlin Shauki film, and dead funny if you pay attention to detail.
Era Fazira cannot at but i guess she has to be all pretty there in order to carry out the role of a millionaire's wife. go figure.
anyway,on the way back home from one utama, i was listening to the radio and David Archuleta's new song came on the radio, "a little to not over you" i think, was the title (i know that last sentence is a bit off in grammar, but i'm too lazy to do anything about it)
the first thought that came to my head was, "wow! David really does mean what he sings, i mean, really, the first single he releases after cutely winning American Idol was crush, with the lyrics
"but i know this crush ain't going away iay iay iayeah" and true enough, it never did, all the way to his next single"
but it looks like sometimes you should be careful what you sing, like the plain white t's for example, their first release had the lyrics "hey there Delilah whats it like in New York City? I'm a thousand miles away but girl tonight you look so pretty, yes you do", very sweet words, but then in their second release they sang "hate is a strong word, but i really really really dont like you, now that its over, i dont even know what i likes about you"
well, i guess Delilah had to much fun in New York City.

but, i know that's not true, Delilah is still with the lead singer of said band... but it makes you wonder... there is always the begining and an end to everything.
there is always a first time for everything, including what you say.
take for example Donald Trump, i bet he really enjoyed the first time he said "you're FIRED"
but for him, the first time he said that, he enjoyed it so much, he never learned to stop saying it...
maybe THAT'S why he decided to have a show called The Apprentice, so he could go on saying those words without firing everyone who work for him.there's a thought.

so talking about thoughts, my mum and I went out somewhere and i left my purse under my pillow, cuz i wanted it away from the window in case anyone wanted to steal it (god knows who would! its not like i have money in there, in fact sometimes i wonder why the heck i have a wallet in the first place?) but since my mum always told me to practice being paranoid from a young age so i'll grow up to trust no one except my pet and a fluffy pillow.
anyway, when i went out my mum told me she took my wallet (god also knows how she knew it was under there... what else does she know about me? uh oh, time to change the locks to my bedroom)
and a verse of a song just popped into my head, here it is

I hid my heart under a pillow
away from the wide open window
where unwanted stealing hands roam
i just wont let them
take my heart as their own


i honestly do NOT know where that verse came from, yet another thing god knows and i dont
its begining to anoy me.

1 more stupid pix and more stories of boredom

above,from left fiona,demonstrating the art of the full mouth,then debra trying to look scary but came out looking handsome,ash,the granny...i dont know what she's doing,then revathi,the only one who did NOT put on a funny face... then last but not least...well,least positive thinking is Nicole...doing her Jap Anime face.cute huh?

hey so i am finally back (to those of you who actually noticed my absence) and i to those who did NOT notice my absence now know that i WAS actually absent.
anyway, over the last week and a half, nothing new really came up...except maybe a few weird ideas and thoughts.... here are some

society makes a point of lying to each other... for example... have you ever noticed a "FRESH!!" sign on a box of dried raisins?
i mean come on! they are dried and preserved in a box for god knows how long!!!!
jeez, we're not THAT dumb....or are we.... i for one actually BOUGHT that box of 'FRESH' dried raisins....hhhmmmm, makes you wonder.


so i was watching the video for the song "dangerous" by cardinal official and Akon and noticed the bootylicious (yes,that word is actually a word...Beonce invented it and it went to the dictionary) model in the video....then i started to think about the stereotype model and realized that the universal idea of beauty (according to MTV anyway) is a big ass, big boobs,big hair and small everything else.... including brain.


to live your own life
and not to influence your life apon something
someone else has written
is to write your own story instead of taking another's
story and make it your own version
that is the difference between Harry Potter
and Barry Trotter

i wonder if those students crying about miss Woon (on our last day of school)
were crying because they were so happy to finaly se her non existent backside (like mine)
getting left behind in afternoon session while we accend up towards morning session...
or they were crying because they realized miss Woon ain't staying behind but actually straping a floatation device onto our boat and following us up to morning...i stll wonder...


those were my random thoughts over the last week, there were other mixed up situations like last saturday when i reserved a book at MPH and when my mum picked it up, my name had somehow become "Meera" with my mum's phone number as the contact number... or when my grandmum said she enjoyed drinking goodyear (the tyre) instead of goodday (they milk)...

oh! and today when she cium my hand instead of me her's... for those non-malays out there who are reading my blog, in Malay culture an younger person is supposed to kiss/salam an older person's hand as a sign of respect.... so obviously my grandmum kissing my hand made me feel old.... does not help that i tower over my friends..well most of them.... like when i bumbep into an old friend at one utama last saturday the first thing she said to me was "eh! Mia!!!" followed by "tinggi nye you ni" which is another way of saying, you are to tall and never gonna find a husband in Malaysia due to the fact that most of the guys here are midgets....compared to me at least... then again... why would i wanna marry now anyway? i have barelly started my life to have it taken away by marriage...duh!

okay, enough blabbing, i gotta go and download some suicidal songs that my aunt wrote down and that i actually like....despite having been a cheerleader and a bookworm. rock songs...well...rock!
k ciau.

i got tagged

1.do you believe in eternal love?
no, i do not, because we do not live for till' the end of time, and if we did, what is the point of loving?

2.do you ever think to much?
me, all the time, but sometimes i can say things without thinking...just goes to show i think about more stuff than just what to say next.

3.what was the most craziest thing you have done?
i don't remember... i don't think the things i do are crazy... but my friends do so ask them.

4. what do you see yourself becoming?
i don't know why but i can't see that far yet, but i know what i wanna be, i wanna be someone who is crazy,funny,smart,accomplished, unpredictable,creative,fun and loving, i still have to work on the last part.

5. who are the 3 most hated people or type of people!
-people who pretend they are someone else
-people who are close-minded and bitchy
-those hurt me,make me feel stupid about myself and don't care that they have... but i love those people to, for making me stronger... you know, like that Christina Argulera song... "make me worth a little bit harder,makes me that much smarter, so thanks for making me a Fighter" or something like that

6.what was the most stupidest thing you have ever done?
when i was younger, i skipped a classes with my friend...when we got caught, we lied and said my friend's mother took us out of the school....when really we were only hiding in the empty classrooms on the third floor of the school, we got in more trouble then if we had told the truth...
that is one of the most stupidest things i've done....i cant remember the rest.

7.what is your biggest fear?
a friendship with a good friend turned sour and losing my i-pod

8.fav drink from starbucks.
any form of Frappucino...ice-blended

9.do you find it hard to let go?
of friendships and stuff like that.....yeah.

10.what do you value most in your life?
so far as my life has gone, i value friendships most,that and love...love for my i-pod,love for my fat cat (aazraa),love for my ash,love for my mum... you get the point.

11.5 things you cannot live with out.

-my music
-my books
-my oxygen
-my friends and future boyfriends
-my family
in no particular order

12.do you have self confidence?
yes and no,i have enough confidence to speak in front of a large crowd,to dance and to act. i have enough confidence to wear a bikini,to speak my mind,to do crazy things and to tell people things straight to their face... but i do not have confidence to speak to a MALAY guy for the first 30 minutes... i say 1 word,they reply half a word....i tried!

13.do you depend in makeup?
er...no, i hardly wear any, unless i have to dance or perform on stage, that to i let Aliya do my make-up...and Fuzzy

14.do you care what people think of you?
do i sound like someone who cares what the general public thinks about me?
no right?
but i do care of what those close to me think of me because those are the people that matter, those who don't know me can stuff themselves.

15. 10 things you want in your man
-funny
-smart
-not egoistic
-does not wear to much jewelry or hair gel
-not afraid to say what he means
-someone who is not afraid to admit that he is wrong
-someone who is open-minded
-a guy that cares what i think
-a sweet guy who is romantic but not soapy
-a guy who is taller than me and does not care what people think of him nor me


okay, take one question from the selection above on your blog and add your own, then tag your friends and notify them by leaving a comment on their blog sayin "you've been tagged" or something along those lines.

here are the people i've tagged
-ash
-fuzzy
-marineko
-sushi girl
-don sarcasma
-ma fong
-debra

my overdue last day news and 'DATUK' Shah Rukh Khan

aazraa, oh no!!!!!! sushi went out of buisiness how will i ever LIVE!!!
the gang. aazraa aka fat cat is the one who looks like she is holding her breath cuz of the stink...that ash aka granny gave out...on ash's right is alia doing the middle finger to those who think Alam is gay... which means me and the gang... then there is me, pretending i have no idea who these weirdos are... behind me is fuzzy,looking sweet without realizing it...as usual, and at the top is nani...giving Sheikh Mussafar a good run for his money as she stares in to space...
nicole on left then sucjita...pronounced su.ji.ta and then fuzzy grimancing at the rock songs on the MP3.....well, her name IS fuzzy!
okay, so they decided to give SRK Datukship...
right, so it took Nicole David to win the squash #1 in the world title twice, to get Datukship and it took a few hair flips from SRK to get his???
the Economy must be really bad for the price of Datukship to be so low.
SRK is not even a Malaysian?!
oh well never mind.
so last tuesday was my last day in school... here are some pix......er.... they are up above. as you have noticed

OBAMA and tarot kits

so OBAMA won!!! i'm still happy, even if it has been what? a 5-7 days?
but then at least i knew that he won when he did...
so last Friday i was talking to my friends Dian about stuff when she suddenly proclaimed that she was tired, putting her chin down on the cafeteria's old wooden table (i'm not sure how old, but the school is around 110 years old,so the tables must be PRETTY old, i think they maybe older than my grandparents) with her hands flat down... then immediately her hands and chin shot out in the air and she said proudly and penuh semangatly said that "OBAMA ROCKS!!!" as she had put it,her face a mask of OBAMA rockiness. i was happy to discuss it because i have been following the Election (not that i have a choice, my mum forces me to watch CNN every other night,so i was forced to endure Sarah Palin's comments about the "real America",apparently New York is the fake America that just so happens to be one of the richest cities ever...so real America is poor? Sarah Palin seems to think so) so i looked up, full of joy! saying "yeah! i'm so glad that he won the Election!!!" and Dian turned to me with a Blur look on her face,she looked at me confused and asked.... he won ah?!
i said..."yuh"
dian was like "oh"
and we both endded up laughing and when we stopped she looked at me and asked in a serious voice, "so Hillary Clinton lost lah?"
that made me laugh even harder,shaking the table (which i was worried would collapse...you know being so old and all).
i said yes she did...months ago... now McCain lost..
and of course...she did not know who McCain was.
not that i blame her of course.

okay, about the tarot kit, i have always wanted to learn about tarot card reading and so i always wanted to buy a set so i could learn... this was three years ago, i kept asking my mum for one, she said no cuz its stupid... coming from a lady who owns a copy of Linda Goodman's love signs (a book that predicts love based on horoscopes) is quite rich (dumb and unfair) so lately i have saved money for some reason...or no reason other than to just save money... so the week before i was in kinokuniya and saw a shelf filled with tarot card... so my mum wont buy me a set...but i have the money, so you can guess what i did. i would buy it behind her back (hey i was really curious) but the main problem was how to smuggle it out of the store after i bought it... i wanted to buy a kit and those things are big.. well big enough to be noticed by my mum in my bag.... so i needed a bigger bag... but how do i carry one of those without raising my mum's suspicion to what may be in it?
she gave me the answer (unknowingly) she propossed we go jogging at the park near KLCC... sure!!! perfect!, because i have this high sierra mini hiking bag... i mean mini, its half the size of the school bag but designed as such that it can fit the same load. i brought that along, but left it in the car as my mum said we would come back to fetch her purse cuz she's too lazy to carry it in her fanny pack. so we jogged (me waiting for my mum every 100m as she refuses to let me out of her sight) and we ate breakfast at Domes...she did not suspect anything. so then we ate and then went up to kinokuniya and waited for it to open (it opens at 10am) so we waited and my mum asked me to take pictures of her to put in her blog...she made me take them again due to the fact that i'm horrible at taking pictures... and the fact that i could not wait to buy my tarot set (who am i kidding? i'm horrible at taking pictures) so it finaly opened and sincxe before at Dome's i asked my mum to look for a book titled "free software fo dummies" since i cant remember where it was and she was the best person to look for it cuz she has photographic memory... she fell for it and looked for it..while i sneaked off to the tarot card section and picked one (the cheapest one that just so hapens to be a tarot kit for teens and it cost me RM 74.76 which is the cheapest) and hurried to the counter to pay... my mum could be anywhere (even if she is looking for the book in another section, she might decide just to ask the info counter which is near the counter i was paying for the kit at...but at the same time i cant pay at the other counter cuz thats where the book was... yes i knew where the book was...smart ay?) so i hurried and i probably looked a little hurried... like a James Bond with out the "shaken" martini, or the girl to womanize. so i paid and pretended nothing hapened... we bought books (as usual) and headed home (after having lunck with aunty sonia) so i asked the tarot card questions and it said that in the past and present my love life sucked, and in the future there would be roadblocks and i'll have to let go and if i do i'll be happy... the present card was the king of cups in reverse position... which means there is a selfish egoistical guy in my life... i dont know if in reality it is true... but from my friends foint of veiw... HELL the guy in my life is egoistical...from my friends point of veiw...did i mention they hate this man which is supposedly in my life? (those of you on the inside will know what i mean) and ash, when you comment dont write his name...

toned down twister

so the plan was that today, our class was supposed to play twister for PJ, hmm, no such thing, i found out yesterday that pn lalita banned it...why? because the day b4 that nicole brought the Twister game to school and a couple or ex-prefects did the Twist. so the teachers apon seeing the kids having so much fun with twisting and streatching, decided to ban the game, i've already told off Nicole... yesterday (i did not come the day b4) but i think we can still bring it 4 PJ cuz its counted as a sports game (or an advanced streaching exercise), plus my PJ teacher said yes, and so we are still playing Twister for PJ, so it came around into a full circle...thank god its for the better.

so the reason i did not come the day that Twister got banned was cuz i was visiting a near death aunt...was because she is now dead. she died yesterday at 1pm...exactly when visiting hours start...
she had liver failure,she could not breath, the anzymes and minerals in her body were unbalanced and she died of auto-immune (her body attacked itself)
i attended her funeral last night, but i did not cry, frankly i did not know her that well, and when i visited her the night before her funeral night, i knew that she had slim chances to live, so i sorta prepared myself... and so did the family, but that did not stop them from crying...
unto lighter things, this morning my mum caught me wearing her white strapless simease (i think thats how you spell it, but in other words simease means singlet without the straps) great, we were already late and she was already in a shitty pie mood,and she noticed the simease...
its not my fault!!! mine were dirty and the ones that i washed over the weekend went missing!!!
and i was going to give her back (but not tell her cuz she'll say no and i'll end up wearing a shitty pie dirty simease) i wish i could wear my pinafore but i am malay and its friday...plus there is agama today so i have to wear my baju kurung (in our school come agama time we are all FORCED to wear tudung) so i cant exactly wear a tudung over a pinafore... i have done so before and i discovered that most ustazas enjoy making fun of students and enjoy humiliating them... i think the word is sadist..or is it masochist? it sure as shitty pie ain't optimist (is that how you spell it?)
anywho, the point is i hate my agama teacher this year... at least last year the teacher was nice and actually teach us something, this one just gives us notes to do...

jealousy

jealousy... hhhmmmm, i bet you all know what it feels like, that twisting bitter feeling in your gut, the feeling that makes you feel like tearing the person you are jealous of into tiny little pieces to be tossed to the dogs.
i do, but i try not to let it influence my actions towards a person. i know that jealousy is bad but is there any possibilities that maybe it might come in useful?
think about it, we have this particular emotion, what do we do with it?
some use it as a tool for revenge,some become a tool of revenge but don't even realize it, some ignore it and some simply show it to the world without shame.....
like my friend in school, she got all A's and yet she still beats herself up (mentally) because someone else has higher marks than she has... she feels jealous of the person and uses it as a tool to actually do better, i have another friend who is jealous of other people's friendship and tries to steal friends away to attract attention, one might also be jealous of a friend of coupling with an ex-boyfriend and that jealousy parts their friendship and lay waste to their once golden friendship...then the best friend found out why her friends broke up with the her ex and the two friends be friends once again...
but why are some people more prone to feel jealousy than others?
is it genetic?
is it upbringing?
is it something to do with your horoscope?
or is it a mixture if 2 or more of these elements?
and should we use this jealousy to gain? or do we ignore it and be jealous free?
or both? depending on the situation?
i have no idea why i'm writing this down in the first place!
jeez now you know how nuts i really am!
k.bye...

Prefects day ...this year

so, this years prefects day started off with a puff, but ended with a scream...literally.
first came the performance from the prefects.... in my opinion, only Mei Jen's piano piece was good amongst them, then came the solo freestyle dance competition, they needed 2 form 1ns and 2 form 2s for it, sonia n needia went up, but it was supposed to be me or Ash on account of the front of the 2N & 2A classes were cheering for me and Nani, who was on the stage suggested someone from black rose to come up, Ash, she did not one to, because she could not pick the song, if she has to do a solo, forget it! its either 2 of black rose, all of em' or none at all!
thats the same reason i did not go up, i do not want to be stuck dancing to some crap like...well some crap!
anyway, Black Rose wanted an open floor, so we went up the stage and requested for one, Nani was like, FINE!!! and opened the floor.
the Black Rose danced together to some of the songs... others were boaring...but when "so what" by pink played... we all started jumping and singing "nananananana we're all gonna get in a fight!!!" and we all jumped and sang and danced, when miss Woon came up to tell up that open floor time was over we protested, but no.... we could not.
so after jumping and all we went out of the hall to class dancing an after jig when a solemn voice came up on loud speaker saying "pelajar pelajar, sila masuk dewan dan beratur dengan segera" we ignored them and went on until the third call, to which i looked at Ash in a mid-jig and went "pffttt" and went back to the hall to line up in an orderly line and took orders from papan (we call ms Woon that cuz she is really, really,really thin...she's thinner than me) in a hall only a few minutes ago was filled with the sounds of "we're all gonna get in a fight"
true enough, we did, but ms Woon was fighting an always losing battle.
imagine, she told us to keep quiet when we were cheering for the prefects.... what does she expect one clap per student? go figure.

end of the year

so the form 3s has had their PMR, signaling my turn to not have a life.
but so what?! the last two weeks at CBN are all planned out! this week is the netball tournament!!! today (monday) is the prefect's day, we have all the prefects performing, its supposed to be a surprise but since its today and all the senior prefects are in school, there's no hgarm, the reason to which i know this is because alia, who choreographed our black rose dance came teacher's day... did it again with the junior prefects dance... black rose was supposed to help so i was there... but i dont think i helped that much... ash helped with the smiles, nani helped with the teachings and i did...but very little, alia helped with the steps and me and ash did a free style dance in front of the prefects.... junior and the senior... the only reason they paid attention and started dancing was when ash fake smacked my butt...HEY!!! its an all girls school and i and ash are good friend. dont call me a les either!
anyway this wednesday i gotta go to the public speaking thing... they filmed us on thursday and friday speaking and acting... a good public speaker must master 3 things and do them congruently, they are visual,vocal and verbal... so we worked on the vocal/verbal for the first day and worked on the visual on the 2nd... visual is what you see, the facial expression, the hand gestures and such... so on the 2nd day, the teacher made us do some ridiculous actions to essentuate (is that how you spell it?) the story line... i had to act like tarzan... loincloth and all. and the other half of the froup had to act like the hungry giant from "jack and the bean stock" fee, fi,fo,fum and all... so you can imagine how ambarassing the tape would be... so we are all turning up on wednesday in the pink dorm to laugh at ourselves and each other, or at least i am... most wont even turn up due to ambarassement... the one thing i am immune to.... well, in most casses...
next week, we are gonna play twister on PJK, i'm the AJK so i get to organise it.... other than that, next week we are going to prank a teacher into opening the drawer in their teacher's desk in our class to reveal the (probably) 20-year-old dead rat... i'm not kidding!!! there is a real (real dead) rat in that desk... complete with cobwebs in its hollowed belly... hmmm... mayb we'll prank en ruzailan....or en. azra.....maybe the PJK teacher.... hehehe, the posibilities are endless!!!!

bullies

I'm at the library of my mum's morning work place at BANK NEGARA.
it was a normal day albeit a very cheerful one. I went up to the M floor (i have yet to find out what M stands for and probably another week to spell it correctly) to put my stuff down at my mums office before coming down to the Ground floor to the cafe, in order to buy myself some breakfast.
after all this, i went up to M and took my stuff and headed towards floor 1 to the library, when the lift came, it was reasonably crowded so i frowned... then a voice from behind the lift said "don't worry you can fit in"
and when i was in another voice replied to the first one i cant really remember because i was so angry at what she said... but it was something like "but it must be hard,with that fatty in front there" and they laughed like the bitches they ARE. i looked to my right and there was the said lady, she looked at me so sad, almost crying and said "sorry" i looked at her as best as i could (she did not look me in the eye) i said "its okay" by this time the doors were already open and at my floor...
i regret to say that i got out... it was so fast and i really only got terribly angry a few steps out, thats when i looked back and saw the door half closed...
i was so pissed that i banged my card onto the sensor in front of the library door. i am angry at myself for not doing anything about it, bullies like that deserve to be stood up to due to the fact that when you do, they start sobbing because the only reason that they act like byatches is because they feel bad about themselves and put other people down because of it.
the lady was so sad, but she should not be... she is smart (she works in Bank Negara), she is kind and she should know that she cannot allow herself to be bullied just because of her weight!!!! and those WOMAN who humiliate her, i pity you, someone like you must not have much of a life if you are busy sticking your nose into other people's buisiness, i do not CARE that you work in Bank Negara! brains is no use if you are going to waste it away on remembering and nosing into other people's life and i dont CARE that i am just a school girl at least I live my OWN life without bothering others who have not done anything to bother you!
and to any of you Bank Negara workers who read this, please tell your friends in office to read this and them to tell their friends to read this...
there is a bully amongst you ruining anothers life with insecurities, i'm sure you all are busy, but please try...

i've house bunnied a lizard!!!!

i have turns a normal green lizaed (cicak) pink!!!
do you wanna know how???
well, to tell you the truth what i did was not that great, this was how it hapened...

last monday when i was breaking fast, we made a jug full of air bandung and by the end of the night there was only a small portion left. so i was so tired that i just left the bandung there instead of stuffing it into our fridge. so the nest night, we bought sugar cane juice instead and needed a jug to pour it in. so i took the bandung jug down stairs and poured the contents into the sink and along with the pink bandung came a pink cicak!!!
its head was green and its body stained pink. i called my mum who laughed. i've got a few pic but they are in my mum's phone and my mum is to lazy to re install the nokia thing on our new laptop (our old one went pop) so i guess i'll put the pics in when we get the time to re-install it.
but what i found most ammusing was that looking at the pink lizard, i remembered my friend faz. she absolutely loves pink and is obsessed by it... at the same time she is also terribly afraid of lizards... she once pured an intire bottle of clorox onto her feet to kill a lizard perched there (poor lizard) so i really wondered what would be her reaction when she saw her most loved thing and her most feared thing combined.
yesterday i did and all that came up was
"ew" which was her only comment...hhhrrrmmmpppphhhh
after all the pics, all she can say is "ew"....typical
anyway capoiera's b'day just passed...it was yesterday. i wished despite formerly being absolutely furious at him for the carnival incident....er...i'm not gonna tell about that again, you can read my previous post from august if you wanna... but keep in mind the jerk is forgiven.
i told my mum and she was like "hah! there you go" she's smug cause she thought the whole quarel is dumb... i dont really think it was, well, not completely dumb at least.
kay,i gotta go b4 my mum comes. ciau!!!

pop! goes my hand

ramathan!!! a busy time for food stalls,mothers,trafic policemen,ustazahs and doctors....
doctors?
if you are wondering why your brain is hurting after you have broken fast, its not lethargy!
its the stupid kids outside with the fire crackers going "BING BANG BOOM" like a bad gangster movie. and for what?
how should i know? ask them?
last night my family and i were conversing over skype with my uncle (who is in Edinburg), when a frightfully loud sound interupted our feeble attempts to decipher my cousin's scottish ramblings (or at least is sounded like ramblings from this side of the world). a fire cracker or whatever that freaking thing was startled all of us and we started to get angry...my uncle joined in to, we could not understand why the hell the kids did not play in the huge field/basketball court/park instead of the middle of the tar road. it did not help that the comunity is quite small conpared to the rest of Bukit Jelutong and normal sounds echo enough, they had to put in a big BANG.
it was late, and my granmum was alresdy anoyed at the fact that she cant hear my uncle and his kids clearly over the speaker... my grandmum, who normaly does not intervene in matters which makes her stand up to the public (her daughter's and grandaughter's love lifes are a different question), got up and told the buggers off came in and continued with the video conference... but of course, due to my granmum's inexperience of telling off people who are not related to her (she always nags me to clean the house... not thinking that i already have to clean four rooms,clear the trash, dust my piano, feed the cats and do the laundry, if i do anymore i might as well declare my self a slave...when i told her she said her kids always helped, to which i replied that she has 4 kids and my mum only has1) the BING BANG BOOMS started again...this time my aunt went out...i followed.
my aunt has this look she gives to people she is angry with that scares the poop outta them (i'm trying not to swear...much) and even makes the ones she is not angry with scared... so i really wanted to see the guys being told of...due to an old vendetta with the kids of my neighbourhood. and i was not dissapointed!!!
my aunt came back and all was silent.
next time i'll try and have her deal with the teenage guys smoking behind our house...my window is filthy due to the exess of smoke, the plants are dying and so are their brain cells.
i dont get why you smoke at 15-18. you wanna be cool?
FYI
you drool
you sleep around your school
you flunk
you're dumb
you're probably end up a drunk
your lips,their black
and you better step back
your breath,it stinks
did you ever stop to think?

sorry, to all you under age smokers...its the truth... and as for you 'grown up' smokers, at least its legal. don't mean the ryme ain't for you to.

books books books

the most weird and greatest thing hapened to me yesterday as i was breaking fast at A&W with my mum, i got spotted by one of the readkl blog people...i'm not sure what they are called, i think they are scouts...
they take pictures and post blog entries abot what people are reading in KL! my mum and me got our pictures taken and posted on the blog!!
that was the weird part... the great part is that i get to know about books!!!! more books. and yes,i'm a geek. who the hell cares? i am so happy that i found this site, you can find it on my link list under "we also read". if you are a reader you can check it out. my mum got spotted reading the science of leonardo my fritjov chopra, the author of the tao of physics. so my mum is looking pretty smart now... did i mention i wanted to read that? i was the one who convinced her to buy it.
i got caught reading "the last of the wilds" by trudi canavan. i love the age of the five trilogy!!! i've read the 1st book and the last of the wilds is the second... and i've already bought the third book.

okay, aside from book matters, let me write about something else...
never mind.

ai ai ai

lately its been fights,folios and hunger. fuzzy is still somewhat sore with ash, fuzzy cant really forgive people as easily and ash is confused about fuzzy's moodiness "its not like i'm no longer her friend". folios being history and geo, geo for the rest of my class,i'm only doing my history.
hunger from fasting, a week has already passed and there are 3 more weeks till raya and my RM200 as well as more duit raya... i hope.
i enjoy fasting for 1 reason, i dont have to think of what to eat in the morning and afternoon, just for buka puasa. but i also hate fasting because of the little talks they give in the dewan stating that we should wear tudungs on this month of ramathan... that is not fun. why should i wear it only in this month just to get pahala? i do things because i believe it is right, not because i want something from it.
anyway, never mind that,i have finished braking dawn and i loved it, i dont really get exited anymore on the honeymoon stuff,i'm used to it in a sense that i've read it to many times in the many books i've read... plus, once or twice is okay, but edward and bella just love each other to much, it gets boaring after a while, i finaly found my reading groove again at the near end of the book where the action picked up,the giving birth part was scary... giving birth itself is already scary, but giving birth to a half vampire/half human is just pure terror.but beautiful at the same time. i guess us females always have to be uber complicated. even our sense of humour.
i read in readers digest that females analize their jokes before they laugh while men just laugh cuz they think the joke is funny. they stuffed the subjects into an MRI machine and showed a cartoon on an overhead screen, the females MRI shows that the females analize the jokes and if they think it is funny, the reaction trigers more strongly to it than a man's... whereas the man is more like, "hey look cartoons! must be funny! funny is good" as stated by the readers digest.its complicated thinking about how complicating we are. anyway, less babble. i gotta go. see you.ciaou!

you know that dream..?

you know that dream where there's a flee market located behind your school with shamans and magical beings selling their services? or the one where you are in a huge make-up store looking for something yet you can't find it? or the one where your neighbour in an apartment turns out to be your long time foe who wears a mash of an inocent house wife?
i hope you dont, because its freaky. which means naturaly i've had that dream. i've heard that dreams analisis can actualy show where you stand and help you get through your problems if you understand your dream... if that s true and my dream is really skrewd up does that mean i'm skrewd up to?
the flee market may symbolize someone who is dear of magical to me helping me go through something... or it may mean i've read one to many books, the make-up thing might mean that i found it so hard to go to and elianto outlet to buy eyeliner for the miss everybody thing inn school (i'm representing my class) the theme is guardian angel so our class decided to do james and jane bond... only reversed,as in jane saves james and jane is taller then james. so i've got to have that cream/gold eyeliner from elianto as well as the black one... the problem is that my mum wont let me buy make-up and i do want some eyeliner...and i find it hard to buy the eyeliner without my mum finding out since i spend most of my waking hours around her when i'm not in school.
then there is the neighbour wearing a mask thing, that may mean someone i know might not be as nice as i think... since in my dream he took the mask of (in my dream the baddie is a guy wearing the house wife mask) i'm not sure if that means i'm gonna find out or if i know someone like that... bth could be possible.

dreams are actually what we think about when we are awake playing out when we are asleep. which means you are already thinking about this stuff subsconciously. that is probably why i believe in dream analysis, you are already thinking these things so by analyzing your dreams you actually get to know what you are thinking that you did not know you were thinking... if that makes sense.
anyway i've gotta go and update my facebook..if i have time.

computer with a side of fries

guess what?? during me and my mum's movie mania,our computer got fried. it was raining bolts and lightning, seeing as mu mum is a facebook junkie,she left the computer with the broadband line in, ready for a speedy call to facebook (the poor fellow must be exausted!)
so lightning struck and our house blacked out, not without a loud popping sound signaling the end of my computer's life. what is so sad is that i forgot to back-up the new pics in my computer. there were pic of me and my friends at school,me and my old friends at the carnival,my 14th b'day photos and my uncle jack's wedding photos. that is the worse lot. but there is still hope of restoring the data if the fry was not serious, but we'll only find out when we take it for repair (god knows how long THAT will take), so i now have no alternative but to ask a friend to print out some pics for me (in colour). i'm sure you all are wondering howw the hell i'm writing this, well, the clinic my mum works at suplies doctors to the bank negara clinic,since i'm form 2 and in the afternoon session,i have to follow my mum to bank negara everyday and i get excess to the library and to its computers and printers...i'm not supposed to since my mum does not really work here... in a sense that my mum does not actually get paid by the same people the employees at bank negara do. so technicaly i have no right, but the staff dont complain since i'm here everyday and practicaly no one really uses these computers cuz they have their own laptops. which really pisses me off (the part about them having lap tops and that mine is friend due to my mum's carelessness and mine for not saving the pics) one more thing is cuz the printer here does not have coloured ink and i need coloured pics for my history folder/project its 30% of my end of the the year exam marks. and i need to get an 'A' cuz i had a deal with my mum (if i get 'A's for math,science,english and sejarah,she'll buy me a new set of earphones for my i-pod)
and the fact that i wanna prove that i am interested in our country's history.
it is now fasting month and there wont be any PJK (or PE) for the muslims (which is fair) but the non-muslim'll have to skip PJK to and then we'll all have to take notes. i just wish it is not so unfair for those non-malays who dont fast and enjoy PJK. but then again it wont be fair to the malays who fast and love PJK to sit inside taking notes while the rest of the class have fun outside, so i guess its better that way, yet it still sucks. the extra-curricular activities have also been halted so that the koko marks (curricular marks) wont be even. living in a multi racial community rocks, but it can suck at times to... for example,now during the fasting month.
gotta go!
myrra shaima

paper chain explosion!

yesterday, all of the members of my class did not sit the whole day.
why?
because there is a competition for best decorated class this Merdeka!
we were so busy that we did not notice how our class actually looked! we were runnibg around, climbing on chairs,tables,tables on top of tables to get the banner,cards and flags in place.
there were glue guns, there were colages and ballons that we took out later. and when we were done, we had a colage of our twin towers with 3D bridge railings (made with straw wrapped in purple paper) and out linned with string with people of all races in the bridge, a banner at the back of the class,5 cards hanging from the ceiling,our malaysian flag hanging from the side of our class (on both sides exactly the same level and i should know) our windows are old fasioned and wide paned with pink cutains and we had paper chains draping from the railings and paper lanterns hanging from the doors, we made life sized people drawings on colourful paper (we connected many coloured paper together) we made three of those in three different races, indian,malay and chinese (these are the tree main races that make up our country) we had signs made that says "merdeka!" each letter on a different coloured paper which we atteched together and taped to the windows so it can be seen from outside and inside, the same thing was done to the whiteboard only at the sides.
basicly our class looked fantastic... but so do the other classes. so for the competition i think it will be very hard to win and we would be lucky if we do, but it was fun and i never saw my class THIS co-operative.
then this friday we have this thing where we dress up in our national traditional wear, baju kurung,sari,punjabi suit,cheong sam and many more.
the funny thing is, we are gonna play games in these outfits, traditional games. we gotta jump,run and dance in traditional attire... i just hope no one gets hurt.

why do i have to have a title?

hey, to my readers out there... i think there are five. but only three actually leave comments, the other two just tell me in person. HEY! i loved that new article on your blog!!!!
i'll look at her and ask. "then why the hell didn't you leave a comment?"
and they'll say things like "my computer went nuts and i could not leave a comment" or "malas lah!" or "i dunno" or "why should i?" or "tah"
never mind about the lack of readers, i'm gonna concentrate on the ones i have.
hey!!! you might have noticed that i've just changed my blog layout. you like?
i got it off pimp my profile under...
i dont remember.the small pics and extras have also dissappeared as is what apparently happens when you change layouts...i think that's whack.
so, today Datuk Sheikh Mussazafa came to our school. for those who know him you might squeal and jump up and down... if you dont know him, just google his picture under sheikh mussafa and you will see why the girls scream for him....
i dont. he came to our school to give a speech about things in space...
he asked us if we had any questions and they did (keep in minds i said THEY) but only some were actually about space. one girl asked him when he was getting married.
another asked how he pooped (well at least that has something to do with space)
regardless to say, the girls were more interested in his ass than what he talked about. and me, i was just there for the show. it was kind of funny seeing the girl who asked him when he was getting married shiver and stutter in public... she was hyperventilating...
i was amused by how the girls were acting around him... suddenly it was all eye lashes and flirtatious smiles. not all, but about 99%
i have to admit he is cute, but still, dont those girls know he is probably used to all that attention? why waste their time?
anyway, i gotta go, my mum's calling for dinner, the laptop (if facebooking were a sport, my mum'll have 6pax) and my laptop's bat is really low... gotta go

city life in KL

hare in KL we love to sing patriotic songs, we love to give way and open the doors for others, we love to say please and thank you, and i will like to inform you that in reality... its nothing close to this Merdeka day ad. on TV.
In reality we are the third rudest city in the world, according to the reader's digest poll in 2006 (i think it was 2 years ago)
and New York scored 1st most polite city in the world.
but despite the fact that NYC is courteous and we are not, we do share one dilema.... public transportations...both of ours only have our train stations (subway/LRT for NYC and KL) within our city and they are both very dirty. but the thing that I'm not sure we both do the same is what we do when waiting for our stop on the train, especially if its a long stop.
,some people might read,pick their noses,kiss their spouses and listen to their i-pods and mp3s...
others scout around for an ass to tap or a pocket to pick....
and the rest... I don't know. Maybe they talk their friends and text and talk and stare..... but all these past times are only about 20% of what people do in public transportation. 80% of people in KL actually spend their time in the LRT trying not to get squashed to death.
yup! that is right!

we do not breath. well, not fresh air at least.

one of the reasons why this is so (not including the fact that our transportation system,unlike NYC's, sucks and also the fact that the oil prices hike up.who says the kids dont feel the push?) due to the fact in the caption, most people use the LRT, and in this city when they see a full train, they will still squash their fat arses in while pushing and swearing under their breath. most of the culprits are old ladies.
i really don't understand that(the ass in a sardine can thing),i personally do not shove my ass where it does not fit (including a pair jeans a size to small) because just like the jeans, if i shove my ass into a packed LRT, you are shoving your ass into someone else's face, you wont be able to move nor breath and as a bonus! other people wont be able to breath either. that is why i do not understand it when someone chooses to torture his/herself(and others). Don't they LIKE to breath?
I do. to be fair,if you are late it is okay (even if in Malaysia you normally turn up at a meeting 30 minutes late to actually be on time) what about the old ladies at the pasar who shove their butts in the train? i doubt they have anywhere important to go (especially those who shoves their friend's asses in with them to talk loudly in the train)
when you live in KL or work there and do not take the public transports you will find yourself swearing on the road when you drive home (now that the traffic had lessened due to oil prices) it is not so bad... but you cant escape it. when i ride with my mum in the car my past time is to read and try to ignore my mum's rigorous swearing in 2 languages as well as the swearwords i thought her in German. if I'm not doing that I'll be listening to my i-pod while catching site of a maxis (our local cellular communications company... one of the four) service van speeding and driving like a maniac and thinking "now THATS speed coverage" or I'm looking at the scenery of industrial and business buildings and then have that cut of by a driver on the left lane picking his nose.

that's life huh?

lately

i'm on school break and discoved the art of shaping wire... really!!!
i can make basic stuff with wire.
so far i can only make letters and a few notes, but i'm getting better.
i've been reading the age of white trilogy by trudi canavan... well the first book but its great. i still have yet to buy braking dawn.
havent heard from him but i guess that is to be expected... truly, i'm sorta glad.... in other ways i might not be. never mind.
i goota go, i'm going to my grandparents house where there is no intenet... but i do have a new book and history project i've gotta do on the school's history which is facinating!
who knew my school was this interesting?
anyway, ciau.

stupid friends (continued)

well, after all the drama and anger, i finaly moved to the 2nd phrase which was sadness. i still didnt cry but i was sad... which was weird since there is no logical reason that i should be, yet i was. many thoughts went through my head, leaving me more helpless then the last, does it he even care, does he?

then

if he doesnt....

if he does then why did he act the way he did?

i never ment through the "what if he doesnt?"

i realize that 20 years from now i will look back and laugh... or rather me, i'll be ambarassed by my part in it.

my mum to has lost a friend, or one she thought was one so she knew what i was going through, which was a relief, she told me what oscar wilde said, he said "friendship is more tragic then love, simply because it lasts longer" or something like that.

my 2 bestfriends are having a fight to, about not being best friends anymore. sound familiar?

only in their case its not to be bestfriends, in mine, its never to be friends anymore.

ash reckons i liked him more then a friend, i said OF COURSE. but i chose not to act that way, partly because i know he does not like me more than that at the time (i dought he likes me at all now, i think he might hate me) yet the thought was never acted on.... after the 2nd break-up.

looking back i know i'm too young and still am... even if today is my birthday.

i'm fourteen today! not that he remembered nor ever did but now i know its just because he is just a guy,

i no longer feel useless nor depressed, in places of those emotions lies exceptance (that does NOT mean i forgive him for that way he abandoned me that day and how indiferent he reacted to when i told him we were no longer bestfriends...now i wonder if i was even his best friend. he was mine. if not best, definately good friend. maybe he still is, that is probably why i still can forgive him... i know it sounds cheesy but it really is what i think... and unlike a burger, i cant control all the cheese that comes into my brain (that sounded weird)

i want to say tanx to ash for picking up all my distressed phone call.... and aqil did remember my b'day... aqil if you are reading this, you are not forgiven... until you figure out what exactly you have to do and how.
then i might forgive you.
if you think i'm going to give in as easily as before, then you are wrong.

stupid friends

once upon a time there were 2 kids on a bus, 1 was a girl, the other a boy. they were talking about harry potter whe they first became friends, that friendship lasted till the girl was 1 week shy of 14 and the boy was 1 month shy of 15.
i said until because as of 10-20 mins ago, that friendship ended. i'm gonna tell you why.
in my last 2 posts i wrote about a carnival and how i felt leading up to it.
the truth is that i was terrified. i did not know if every thing would work out or if it would blow.
it blew. i ended my friendship with someone that i thought was my friend. the ironic thing is that he thinks that it started only today... he's wrong. it started at the start of our friendship.
as all beginnings start, but the start of the friendship that went bad was the moment he became my boyfriend... i asked him and he said yes, now i wonder if i never asked if we would even have become a couple. yet sadly after we did i discovered that i had to change schools, and we only had a relationship (if you would call it that) through the phone. looking back, i feel stupid at my naivety. how could it work out?
and the second is that i was to young. what was i thinking?
i broke up with him
then a year later i asked to couple again.... now i felt stupid (was i that desprate?)
then he broke with me... it hit me then. that he never felt THAT way about me... and i was too young only 13 then...how stupid.
so i thought if not in that way maybe we could be just friends.
i was also pissed by the way he did it... but never mind about that.
i always found it hard to talk to him...in the last few years
so today at the carnival, i felt totally left out. i wondered if i should have gone in the first place.
aqil's (capoeira's) b'day is next month, but i thought since today is the only day i could see him in person, i could give him the gift.
so this morning when i arrived i called aqil like he told me to. then he met me at the entrance. he took me to the 2nd floor to meet his friends, i met 2. i remembered sofia... sofia is nice.
so i told him i wanted to go down to get coupons.
i did and came back up.. then went back down cuz my ex art teacher is now teaching in the school i'm supposed to go to ... in a way an ex- school by way of supposed-to-go.
after that i looked up and he was gone. so i had to look for someone else to hang out with that i could stand. suraya had a shift at her school stall and most of the guys are egnoring me. eg. armand,adam naim (who used to be my best friend, but i guess he doesnt want to talk to me)
so i went with atiqah for a while, then on our way up to the haunted house i saw a kid who looked just like aqil's lil bro, so i gave the present to him and askerd him to give it to his bro cuz i kinnda knew i wont see much of him (despite him telling me he was going to intro me to some of his friends)
so i did bump into him some... hour later(or that was how it felt like)
i told him to look for his bro... he said his bro was at home, he showed me a pic and called aqid (his lil bro) true enpugh he was at home.... shit!!!! that was bad!
so i went in earch of the present and on the way i lost atiqah...
great so at this point i lost my former best friend's b'day present, my hang out friend and my former best friend.
so i had to search for someone else to hang out with.
endded up with suraya for a while, then her family came i scooted (no point in intruding their family together time)
by 1 i was alone, angry and depressed, so i called ash (ashileen, its a she) and told her everything, the only thing i could think of is my then friend abandoned me after saying that he wont!!! i do not expect aqil to spend 24/7 with me... that is just selfish... but to abandon me like that is just.... crude!!!! and SELFISH and THOUGHTLESS and... and IRISPONSABLE and BASTARDISH!!! i was crying into the phone with ash!!! you have no idea how alone i felt!!!!
how abandoned...how WORTHLESS, and this is not the first time!!!
even before i thought how hard it was to communicate with aqil... even after years of knowing each other!!! i realized that neighther of us know each other or have anything in common.
i have been contemplating endding the friendship a week before the carnival, but my friends talked me out of it... told me to give it another chance... i am going to yell at them when i get back to school!!!!!
and to make it worse, while i was going over to the dunk tank to dump aqil as a friend i met with the boy whom i gave the present to, i told him to take me to it and he did, i appologized and called aqil for his whereabouts... at the dunk tank i gave him the present and told him i needed to talk to him, i took a private spot and told him

m: this is the last present i'm going to give you and the last time you'll hear from me...we are no longer friends
a:ok (shruging his shoulders looking indiferent)
A:may i know why (still looking indiferent)
M:because you left me going like a school, like an idiot.....blah blah blah (i dont remember this part)
A:yeah kinnda
M:so i'm not your friend anymore
A: ok( and he went off)

i walked away thinking of wat just hapened. i turned back and called him

M: you're a prick
A: yeah okay (indiferently)

right.....i went home in a storm of anger thinking how stupid i was to this heartless asshole, while calling ash and saying the "F" word profusely as well as other exploitives.
people were starring. i couldn't give a damn.
i did cry, but they were tears of anger... i seldom cry because i'm sad. its normaly cuz i'm either really anoyed or really angry.
after the carnival i got a txt..
it was the bastard saying sorry and that he understood if i did not want to communicate further.
i asked him what exactly did he understand
he said that i was angy he abandoned me when i was running around school looking looking for his present...
i told him he did not understand anything
he said enlighten me
i said GO TO HELL
i told him that sorry meant shit in black and white.

while i was looking for the present!!!
HE DID NOT EVEN REALIZE HE ABANDONED ME WAY WAY WAY BEFORE THAT!!!!!
what i'm realy terrificly angry at is the way he responded to me when i endded the friendship.... like i meant nothing to him... not even a cent... not even less than that.
that is one thing that i will never TRUELY forgive in a long long LONG time!!!!
let me tell you what i felt... i felt worthless,stupid,betrayed,abandoned,regretful that i wasted 6 years on him and most of all, i felt ANGRY.
SO AQIL, IF YOU ARE READING THIS, I'M SORRY I CALLED YOU A BASTARD,
I SHOULD HAVE CALLED YOU A F****ING @$$HOLE!

the carnival (continued)

imagine not seeing your best friends or your friends for 2 years and 7 month and then get invited to a carnival where everyone is there... i dont know about you but i'm scared!!!
ever since i moved schools i have not seen capoeira in person... nor yaya,adam,wan,fakerie or any of them... well suraya dropped by once in a while, but other than that.nada.
now capoeira invited me to the carnival where they are all there, i'm scared cuz i'm afraid that they'll be a stranger to me,even capoiera!
i'm afraid i'll be there and watch those who were previously close to be become distant, i bet if i re-read this i'll bang my head on the door cuz of my stupidity, so note to me in the future when i read this, dont bang my/your head on a door or on anything, it's stupid.
i wonder if what i fear does happen if i'll just walk away realizing that they aren't real friends or if i'll cry like a dud. i think i'll do both, realize they are not my true friends and maybe cry or despair at the fact i have lost at least a part of me that has been there since the begining (am i being to over dramatic?). i guess maybe only time will tell. and i guess if i lose my old friends i'll at least have 5 true friends to get me by. aazraa,ashileen,nicole,dhivya,fuzzy,sucjita,hanani and alia (hey, i said at LEAST 5).
ash (ashileen,granny) says that she wants to be friends up until the point she can introduce us to her grandchildren as auntie or aunt.
on to other news, my left earplug for my i-pod is busted, the whole main casing peeled of (i guess i gotta use my mad money to buy new ones...and when i do, i guess i'll have to buy extra ear cover for the buds and stop bringing the it where ever i go (except to school).
talking about school, today we have an experiment that requires us to bring chemical stuff from home (shampoo,baby oil,soap,detergent,lip gloss, etc...) to test its pH value.
cool, now i'll be able to know how toxic or acidic my lipgloss is! hhmmm, i should have someone to bring coke.
more about school. yesterday we had this fire drill (latihan kebakaran) at school and the fire fighters came and showed us the way to extinguish fires and which hoses in the truck is to be used on what type of fires (house or car) and told us we were faster this year (of getting the hell out of the supposed-to-be-burning school) then last year, the record for last year was 12min something seconds, this year we made it 5min something seconds...
and then this fire fighter showed us how the fire hose works.... then asked us to hold it... i did (along with 10 other people) and i pulled the hose upward so we had a mini shower.
that was fun, but one thing that did not turn out right were the fire fighters (who the hell says that fire fighters were cute?)
anyway i gotta go.
ciau

the carnival!!!

the BJ high school carnival is next week and i'm going!!!
i'm so exited to meet my old friends after 2 and a 1/2 years of not seeing each other. especialy by best friend, i have not seen him for three years... makes me wonder if we are best friends...
i just found out his fav colour last night (yeah i'm a hopeless bestfriend) i'm not sure he knows my fav colour.
anyway, tomorow is the "merentas bukit nenas" marathon thingie and i have to wear a xavier shirt (green sports house) when i'm in adele (yellow) but it's all for safety.
i've got lots of work to catch up on and an oral test for english...about water pollution (i know, i would have picked a more interesting topic but my partner had to cuz i have to write the script and the whole thing was supposed to be a team effort) so i let her pick the topic, then later all she has to do is memorize what i write.
its supposed to be a conversation but the thing is, how the hell do you manufacture a conversation...a CASUAL conversation about water pollution and using perfect english?
so not natural, i guess i have to ask teacher if i can use a bit of slang words to liven it up a bit.
ok gotta go and work on casual conversation!

oopppssss...

so get this, i'm in my classroom talking about the vampire diaries with manisha and suddenly she asks you about the ICAS english test....
if i was taking part i said no....
i took part in the new south wales english test...
apparently they are the same thing...
shit, and guess what the exam is taking place today! at 1.30 in lab 6 and 5.....
holy crap! i forgot about that!!!
i totaly forgot about the test...AND the study part!!!! i hope i dont fail!
the reason i am not studying right now is because there is no material to study... that is not in my school library. since this is an extra test and not the main one... holy holy holy mother of crappiola!
not just that i woke up this morning with my usualy sinus...but mr sinus decided to stay longer. and then i burped... in public!
i was in bank negara's library (still am actually) in one of the booths and burped... there was a lady (buisiness lady) in the booth nest to mine i'm pretty sure she heard. i have a sneaking suspicion she was already disgusted by the fact i was sneazing my nose off. so i pretended to dash for the toilet, like i was gonna puke to excuse my burp... now i think about it,is kinnda dumb.
oh well, that's life. oh yeah i was passionately reading the end of the vampire diaries book 1 and put it down when i finnished (it took all my self control not to continue with the 2nd book) i put the book down and rummaged my bag for my science homework... i got the book out and checked the index to see what i needed to do and then, i reached out for my pencil box to discover that i left it in the car...great.
oh well, i ain't gonna go all the way down for that!!! the homework ain't even overdue.
anyway i gotta jet.
buh bye.

growing up

lately, i have not been on blogspot that often due to lack of time,readers and inspiration.
i have been preparing for cheer comp and i had exams and math tuition and piano classes and book check and that marathon next week(wait... its THIS week!) and a carnival the week after with a replacement class of 2 hours math tuition with mr patrick (who still struggles to understand my jokes and am suprised the first time around that i was malay... and a reader and a cheerleader, which for some out-of-this-world reason rymes) and then my piano exam on the 18th nxt month not to mention my birthday on the 7th.

as you can see, i am busy. but that is not an excuse...well it is but it sounds noble when i say it isn't. this all gets me wondering how time went by. i can legally ride a motorbike next year!
and it seems sureal that 2 years before all i wanted to be was a teenager, now i am and i have to live it on the fast lane! the last year and 7 months and 21 days went by in a blink (a millisecond)
so here i am feeling hurried. of course i love always being busy (i get sick when i dont do something for to long) yet i cant help but wonder how weird and strange it will be in 3 years time when my uncle comes home from england and i would have had my 1st boyfriend(as faer as my family knows) as well as a part time job while waiting for my SPM results. my cuzins prob wont remember who the heck i am!

yikes! PMR is next year. i guess it is kinnda facinating and misterious the way i dont know what the future holds for me, nor do i remember most of the past. yet i am also detached from the present for if i am. i would be god (which i clearly am not... for those of you who are confused and hapen to be muslim terrorist bombers, dont blow up my school, i was only stating that if you were to be conected to all of the present then you arn't human...and its impossible because there are to many things going on in the present for our little human minds can grasp)
maybe thats why we need to be selfish and only care what is hapening in our life...

on that thought,
ciau

aches and pains

we have finaly started practicing everyday since cheer comp is up next month and my whole body aches! we have to practice from 11.00am - 12.30am and then from 1.30pm-3.30pm in total that makes... 3 1/2 hours per day, i'm not realy complaining... if you think this is complaining then i recomend you not to be around when i'm having PMS or BDS (bitchy day syndrome)
my mum has now rebaned me from going on the LRT (light rail transport) cuz i forgot (yet again) to call her when i reached school, she freaked and by the time i called her i found out she was on her way to my school. so then when she picked me up at central plaza yesterday i pissed her even more cuz i lost my touch n go card which had 45 bucks in it... she went on and on nagging all the way home (30 minutes out of 45) then i pulled out the card from in between the seats and she told me to switch it with the one in the smart tag.
teehee it was lucky it was there she treaten to pull me out of cheer cuz of the card. (cuz it takes a lot of my brain space). seriously my mum is so against cheer but she still lets me join the team cuz she wants me to be able to make my own choices...she still makes it hard for me...like trying to pull me out the 1st chances she gets.
sorry i havnt wrote here for a while... i've been busy.
oh yeah, i gotta tell you something funny. i a war with this guy, he always calls me pervert... i call him an asshole. he calls me a pervert everytime i pass his bus and one day ash (my bestfriend and she is a girl) dared me to go to asshole and say "are you free tonight, cuz i'm feeling hot and sweaty" which is slutty to say the least. so i did it (not cuz i'm like that but cuz she dared me) well, i tried to. when asshole walked pass i called him but he egnored me... now that was ambarasing. then his friends shated calling him grampa or "atuk" and then i called him chicken. so the day after that i took a diff station. there are two stations near my school one is 'DW" and the other is "MJ" these aren't the real names of the stations. i normaly go to DW but that day i went to MJ cuz ash wanted to splash su with water for some reason, i think payback for splashing her with water...
so anyway i was almost at the station when i heard a bus and the word pervert being yelled out, it was asshole! i cant believe it!!! its like he is my own personal ghost! i really cant believe the fact that he actually spotted me in the midst of all the other girls! oh well, one of his friends made a rude gesture and i yelled "oh! thats VERY mature" and walked off.
i really dont know why he teases me so. i mean, my friends say he likes me and i'll say bollocks!
if he thinks this is primary school then he can just piss off!
but in the ,mean time, i still have to go through with the dare...bollocks!
oh yeah and i changed the pics on 'about me and around me' hope you dont find it offensive like the last batch was!
ciau!

my really bad last post

yikes! what was i thinking?!!!
my last post totally blows!! and not in a good way..
hmmm... maybe you guys should re read my post entitled "the waiting room"
or read it if you haven't already. but plz comment on this post..
thanks
ciau

complements to the chef!

i really dont know why the title of this post is as so... it was just at the top of my head.
so anyway i'm thinking of writing for the school magazine... problem is i dont know the editor.
last year cheng sim knew the editor pretty well but i didnt know that form 1s can go and try to get their article in the paper...plus i know actually realize that i was actualy intimidated by them... being the high fliers of our well reputated school (which by the way, from the standing point of a student is only great by reputation)
yes the standarts of convent bukit nenas (pineapple hill convent...yes i am aware that it sounds funny, kind of like spongebob squarepants) are falling rapidly and the reputations are the only thing keeping us up...that and our choral speaking and debate team.
there are miscreants who are tottaly hopeless academicly but very good at dating...mostly in the evening session...
ok for those of you not from malaysia (that is to say you aren't born in malaysia) that are not familiar with our weird acadamic system let me explain,
we first go to kindergarten at age 4...or was it five?
so then we go to real school at age 7, its called standart 1.
then we proceed to standart 2 and so on until standart 6, where we have our UPSR (ujian pelajaran sekolah rendah) or (the test that tests all that what you learn from standart 1-6)
now, standart 1-6 is at a seperate school from those who have taken their UPSR (13-17 or18)
its called "sekolah rendah" (sekolah means school and rendah means low...but when you out it together it does not mean low school but something like school for the young...a class down from the older students)
so when you get your UPSR results, which consists of 5 subjects (science-sain-,math-matamatik-,malaysia language writing-Bahasa Malaysia penulisan-,malaysia language comprehention-Bahasa Malaysia pemahaman and english-inggeris-)
you go to high school or form 1 (13 YO) then form 2, form 3 (where we taka the exam PMR, where we get tested on what we learned in form1-3 and if you get good results lke all 'A's then you get to choose a stream...science stream or art stream which will be tho course of your career)
in form 4 you learn the subjects in your choosen stream for science its, math, add math, biology,physics,chemistry and so on for art stream its the rest...art, science litrature. if you are in any stream... like science stream for example, you get to learn a subject from art stream if you want to, this subject will be an extra subject in your SPM which you take in form 5.
in form 5 you take your SPM which is like the brit's GASTCs(i think thats what they call them) and the american's SATs. if you do not pass with good results that will qualify you for uni, you take the STPM in form 6...or if you wanna stay to further your studies even if you passed your SPM you can...but most dont cuz its hard to get into university if you stay.


so back to the point, in my school form 1&2 are in evening session (12.45 pm-6.45pm) the students are not as great as the seniors...and this year i'm in form2 so i have juniors... and man, this year's juniors are some lot...the majority are gedik (or overly girly or so most people say... i think that gedik means bitchy...so i dont call the girly girls gedik just manja...but they dont know that),malas (lazy) or totaly hopeless...of course they aren't all like that...just most.there are the choral speaker who are now reprisenting our school in state, the hockey girls and the netball girl (the senior team in netball are the real stars).

sorry about the spelling mistakes and so on, i'm using a library keyboard which i'm not used to using... cuz i normaly bring my lap top to the library (note this is not my school library).
so anyway i'm coplaining about my school cuz my two week holiday is over and i'm going to go to school at 11 (my dance group practice...black rose, we are doing a show on teacher's day...the celebration is this friday i think) and i hate to go backto school...back to grumpy teachers and bloody girls pretending to be it...now that enoys me!
i'm now reading the cronicles of narnia prince caspian...and proceeding slowly...man i miss elex rider and maximum...i heard the 4th book came out but i haven't bought it yet...
and then there's that new anthony horowitz book that is #4 in the power of 5 series...
and then there is twilight and the works...i'm not sure what the saga is called but i heard it is a fantastic book!
i cant wait to read it!
okay i think i better stop before i rant on more on this already very lengthly blog post...ciau

the perfect man

i have this favorite movie called the perfect man starring hilary duff and heather locklear and it tells a story about a girl who's mum is so desperate for a man that she would hook up with anybody, and when he proves to be a jerk and dumps her,she will move taking along her two kids and their luggage. the eldest daughter,holly (duff) at 16 has this blog... and that is where i got inspired to start a blog.
i started a blog with the tittle reality bites and another with the title deep thoughts... i deleted both and started this one... my mum has a blog to and i pointedly stay away from it, and she stays away from mine so that we can have a private life....well seeing as both of us are as much always together like book and glue...the pages in the book need glue to become a book and the glue needs the pages cuz its needed to form a book.
yeah my mum and me are tight, sometimes disturbingly so, i dont even have a social life cuz my mum is always working to maintain our lifestyle... she is a doctor but in malaysia that dont really matter cuz the doctors in malysia are STILL the most poorly paid in the world... oh yeah and the oil prices finally hit malaysia and the rush to the oil station began...which i think if fairly stupid....the people who actually line up for the cheap petrol before the prices hike up. and they are causing a jam because of their stupidity...
what is stupid you might ask?
well, first of all you waste time,energy and breath from swearing at the guy who cut the cue
2nd of all,you are making other people waste their time and energy when they are not even going to the petrol station!
and thirdly, how much money can you save?! you line up in a jam to the station and lose your cheap petrol then you get there and fill in the cheap petrol then you head back out into the jam and lose the cheap petrol again excessively...causing you to return to the petrol station again the next day to load on the hiked up petrol price petrol...make any sense?
so anyway, back to the point which i am stretching. spend time with my mum a lot but still we try and keep things from each other...knowing that we do.if that makes any sense.
one of the things i cannot discuss with my mum is guys...sure i tell her bout the losers who flirt with me(in person...i'm not talking about myyearbook or facebook...wait there are some losers there to...but not all) most of the losers flirt with me in person...
i heard that only losers flirt with good looking people cuz they often attract jerks... i have a different theory....in my country most of the guys are jerks...well at least most of the malay guys...most not all. now let me tell you how they flirt.

the typical would be a bunch of guys yell at you stuff, mostly to insult you or they do that annoying sound with their lips like they are sucking something....
those are the ones that i got... i had two face to face flirts...one when i was 9...so i dont think that counted and another last week...he was doing this promo with papers...he was okay but nothing i'd be dreaming about...mayb ein a nightmare...

what is wrong with me?!
sometimes i think i am a jerk magnet cuz most of the guys i meet in malaysia are either jerks,rude,no class (and i dont meen high class i mean the type where you dont act like a bastard),dumb,3 heads shorter than me with a big ego or cute,single and buff without a brain or sense of humour that matches mine.
yay!!! i'm on a role. i meet a few guys online who rock but then i feel i'm not good enough for them or in fact not good enought period...sad huh?
then i do meet a guy online who i like but hapens to be on the other side of the world....wait, all the guys i'm interested in that i meet on the web are not of the same country....they mostly live in the us or england... i have a weekness for brits.
so this is the question, will i find the perfect man and does he even exist?
girls give me some opinions and boys... between yourselves do you think a perfect man really exist of is he just a female's fantasy?
(even if katie seems to be the only one reading and commenting on my blog and the rest of my friends who read this is female, males are also wanted to comment if one of you,with exeption of aqil hapens to stumble onto this blog and read this particular article...aqil you are welcome to)

ciau!

lil weird things about my family & friends

my grandad once drove of without me in the car when he was actually supposed to pick me up to send me to his house.

my mum once lost her specs and found them in the fridge with the bread and chocolates

my grandmum once got into the wrong car and when i found her and started laughing she scolded me and asked me why i wasn't getting in the car.

i once got into a lift and realised that i was going up instead of down.

my best guy friend listens to heavy metal...and he plays golf

my mum and me have a habit of talking to ourselves

people think my mum and me are cousins and they try to flirt with my mum in front of me.

my grandmum thinks that my grandad is chatting up a girl when he talk to one

i once yelled fuckfuckfuck in front of my teacher without realizing it....she was the dicipline teacher.


my grand mother once confused a brinjol with a tomato

my mum always cleans the whole house spotless but her room is worse than mine

my grandad is bent up on safety but he once misplaced the wire of my nebulizer(by the way i dont have asthma but i do wheeze 1 every 2-3 years)

i have allergy rhinitis but i love to drink chilled water.

i am a female jock... i am also a cheerleader (not a good one but i'm getting better)

my girlfriend fuzzy (yes that is actually her nick name) has never said the word sex but we always make jokes about it.

whooo hooo!!!!

i got a new phone!!! a sony ericsson phone w850i!!!i know its an old phone but it is wayyyy better then my nokia 5060. my mum decided since my phone screen is so busted i can hardly use it, and that i've been practicing my math willingly that i should have it and only if i keep my math grades in reasonable percentages.... not that i got my midterm ppr results for math yet but i know if it is bad then i'll have to give my mum the phone back until i bring them up.
so i know i haven't been writing much, its due to the fact that i didn't get any inspiration or anything to write about.... or maybe i just didn't realize it at the time...
man i prided myself to be someone who does not care what people think, but boy was i wrong... i was so concerned with not caring what people think that i started caring and tried to be perfect... man that sucks!!!
i'm 14 but most people think i'm older... like i can get into pg18 movies older but i look in the mirror and i see a young girl of 15.
so i get disappointed...believe it or not i am really insecure about my looks and little about anything else.... my friends tells me i'm nuts. i tell them they're nuts.
so today i put on my shoes,fav jeans (which i always wear) and my fav top. i feel good...partly cuz i noe i wont lose my balance on account of my wedges go from one side of my feet to the other when i walk..... oh well. my discomfort might also be cuz of my lack of prolonged sleep that every teenager needs.

history today

so its the 2nd week of my midterms and today is history or "sejarah" as we malaysians call it. but the orogin of the word itself is not malay (as usual). the word sejarah came from the word sajaratun... i think that is arabic...
so anyway, i personally love sejarah, but not of my country.
i'm more into the incans, the greeks, the egyptians, norse mythology and that kind of stuff i dont know everything but i am learning. about the greeks i'm interested in their mythology... did you know zeus was said to disguise himself as a wounded bird and when his future wife put the bird to her chest to warm it zeus turned to his normal self and raped her, then she married him to cover her shame... well some stories say so but others dont, its pretty cool.
then there is norse mythology (vikings) about oden and his hall, and fenrir the wolf that will bring ragnarok to life (the end of the world)
but malaysian history is pretty bleak, just a couple of man in power bringing seeking help from the british to restore or give them power, then the british takes over the country and the man in power cries and says it's not my fault. if this hapened once then at least it is understandable but this hapened 5 times. the sultan's of our country must be very dumb those days. i still dont understand why they kill those who are ritcher then them....

bahasa malaysia

my BM exam sucks!!!
who the hell cares about proper BM anymore???
i'm pretty happy with english!!!
at least the sentences are shorter and 1 word can mean 10 things and A can be B.
BM on the other hand uses one word for one meaning!
makes the bloody sentence longer than it should. np wonder in malaysia A is A and B is B
most people here follow rules without thinking or knowing why and they never challenge rules even when it is unfair to them because they think they cant do anything!!!
sorry, i'm stressed due to exam... and friend troubles but i rather not say anything about that cuz someone might start a rumour that i backstabbed my friend!
i am no stranger to rumours, some form 1 idiot started a rumour that my dad is not dead but instead he divorced my mum and i did not say anything cuz i'm ashamed...
first of all if my parents diverced why the hell would i lie and say my dad is dead?
he is still my dad and the divorce is my parents buisness not mine!
and secondly my dad IS dead, since i was 5..or was it 6?
why should i keep crying? just because 1 life is gone, that doesn't mean all lives should stoped being lived!!!!
yes my mum handled the death well and she is obviously single, but she has this strong indipendant streak that is usually found in divorcees, that just means my mum is strong!
and i handled it well because when my dad was alive, i hardly ever saw him, i lived with my grandparents cuz my mum and dad were studiying medicine, still i saw my mum more than my dad because he was a mama's boy and did not like to be away from his mum.
we were happy, and we still are, its just that my dad's not here.
all those comenters, dont say "i'm so sorry" because honestly, i dont feel sadness anymore.

mid term mayham

midterm is coming and i haven't studied boot
for once i'm speechless and all i can think of saying is
SHIT!!!

between mother's day and midterms

so its monday and smack in the middle of my mids and my mums.
but since i find the subject of my mum more cheerful than that of an anoying piece of paper that you would love to swear at, but would look stupid while doing so, i'll talk about my mum.
so i bought her a bracelet, the day before mum's day...so it was all rather hurried.
anyway, so i wraped it up and went down to the car, since i was supposed to wash it for 5 bucks (hey! it might be mother's day but i still need money, that bracelet was not cheap!)
what i did do after opening the car door was close it, locked it and ran up the stairs to my mum's room to say that i found something dead and bloodied on the passenger's seat.the conversation after that is as follows:-

ummi: what is it?

me:its something dead!!!

ummi:no, i mean what animal is it?

me: i dunno its to covered in blood i dont know what it is!!! you better look at it!

ummi: (in a panicked tone) how did it get there?



by this time we were half way to the car




me:how should i know?!


so she went to the car and saw what was in the seat and stopped. she looked like she just got punkd. teehee, i yelled happy mothers day and gave her a big hug, she told me that i should join drama and she is now wearing the bracelet to work...

i gave her a good shock!, damn i should have recorded it!!!!

old memories

its kinnda weird when you read your diary again 2 years after writing it... you realise that things seem stupid and other things funny.
so i read my diary from 2006 again and laughed at some parts and frowned at some parts realising things that you never realised before... puzzles that you hated to answer, words that should have been said and situations long forgoten (and this was only two years ago!)

one particular occurance that is extremely funny and sad at the same time. i dunno if you'll get the sad part but the funny part is definately there.
i have this friend...long time friend who is probably gonna read this article without commenting.
so anyway, this friend was my boyfriend two years ago (now ex). and i had this cool teacher when i was in primary...i'll call her MJ

i was in the school chess team then and we just won the second place in zon keramat (quite a big deal) so MJ decided to treat us at McD's and while waiting for the food my teacher scrolled my phone with my permision. so she went over my contacts and found my friends name... erm i'll call him capoeira, MJ found Capoeira's phone number and asked me who he is... i said he was a friend.... (i was not gonna tell MJ the truth!!!)
but my friends told her otherwise... i kept insisting we were friends, so to check she sent a txt msg to him it said

ini BF myra, kenape u ade nombor dea?

which basicly means

this is myra's BF, why does she have your number

she actually sent it, i saw it with my eyes!

she sent that to my boyfriend at the time!!!!

he got angry at me, like he should (not that i admited it at the time) he said that he only gave me the number cuz he trusted me. as for the BF thing, i think he was mad...
ok he was but not really
i guess he was more mad that i gave my phone to MJ
teehee, if you're wondering if he replyed the msg, he did.
he said we were just friends... which pissed me off.
a lot. he does not know that either... now he does.