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Friday, December 28, 2007

cousin trap

i was recently in alamanda/putrajaya eating lunch at a store called Lemongrass.
i was waiting for my mum(who was working in a clinic just outside the shopping complex)
i was looking quite miserable on acount of my allergies acting up.my eyes were red and puffy,i had a tissue on my slightly red nose and i was having this head splitting headace (or however you spell it) and my mum had lots of patients to see... i had been waiting for her for almost half an hour when i looked up and saw my cousin...another cousin beside her and another cousin beside her and another cousin on CRUTCHES tagging behind them.

-to explain the guy/cousin on crutches, he had a motorbike accident, he's not a mat remp-it or anything... he is anything but,that's why he crashed into that tree. ok, this was what hapend. this guy -Nader- was playing football in the field with his bonehead friends (i only met one of omar's-cousin of close relation with nader and me ...friend,thats singular and he's single and my age AND taller than me,the friend not omar, anyway the point is that i don't know any of nader's friends but if they're anything like him i'm sure they're boneheads) and one of them brought a motorbike...so naturaly, they each took turns for a ride around the field...somehow it then got to the road (i'm sure it was a dare but that was how Nader described it to his da so i'm pretty sure he lied) i guess since the idiot dosn't know how to steer so he endded up driving on the opposite side of the road and then this car came and the ''saukerl'' drove offt he road and into the tree... so the tree thought him a lesson...not the car. he broke a leg and almost lost his teeth...and he's form four as of this year but at the time of the encounter it was still december 2008 so....

Anyway, omm (ommaira,my cuzzin and also form four this year and just had her P.M.R like Nader and Omar, the diffrencence is that she got straight A's and they didn't.... not that it's important but it proves that the prettiest face are the most 'bengong'...translation 'dumb'... which is Omar...i know it's bogus but i do agree Omar is cute...but he got 3 A' and Nader got 5...and he's pimply...but not that bad looking. when i told this to my granda when he called me to tel me their marks-the part about the cuttest face being the most bengong not about the looks of Nader and whatever- he laughed...so did my mum) also noticed me and came over with the other two cousins who look vaguely familiar but i can't recall their names (dosn't help that i suck with names) and said hi! we talked bout some stuff that i think would be pointless to write down here cuz its tottaly irrelevant and they wen't off... notice i didn't say Nader tagged along...either cuz he can't go around the chairs in the shop on acount of his crutches or maybe the fact that ever since puberty we (meaning me,nader,omar,amir and the rest of the guys who has reached puberty) havn't been talking to each other... i'm still very upset about this cuz when we were younger we were closer than MJ and his bleached white skin... we even met up in london together and squabled on a small baby size keyboard and in 2003 we had a flour fight and all went to the family day together and one of them apparently had a crush on me,i'm not gonna say more but i dont think he still has a crush on me but i think that he might be ambarased about it enough not to talk or act like either of us exist...maybe thats the reason all of us ain't talking...my mum said it's cuz they can't control their hormones and i think that that's bull...i mean, we're cousins and sure, acording to religion we can be married but still! we're cousins! and i just don't get them.

ANYWAY, all he did was give me a nod and smile so at least he noticed me and not acting as if i'm not there... so i waited for about 15 minutes and my mum called and told me to abandon our lunch and head out to MPH with strict orders not to go anywhere else. so i headed out and on my way i glimpsed Nader and started swearing in my head... i pretended like i didn't see him for reasons i myself don't know (maybe i wan't him to feel how it feels like to be egnored) and i also realised that i was walking right behind the three girl cousins and i said hi and moved past them into MPH and headed straight into the teen/adult section and i glanced at a book behind me and excidently saw omm's older brother from the corner of my eye with a look of regconization on his face...i pretended not to see him either since he to don't talk to me but we wern't that close when young so it don't really matter as much. a sec later i glimpsed him again from the side of my sight...he didn't aproach to say hi till a couple of minutes later... he said hey! what are you doing here and other mindless chat...
which i also don't remember because of the fact that at that moment i was thinking ''shit! i've walked into a volentarily mute family trap!'' ... it's not that i hate them or anything but its the fact that i've inherited my mum's likeness for privacy as in 'i don't like family other of my tight family circle to know what i do in real life...especialy if the male of this family has egnored me and enoyed me. i told capoeira bout this after the abrupt conversation with shanaz (omm's cousin) he told me to ditch them...but by the time the text came or by the time i read it i had already figured that out...

okay, i think i've writen enough...my arm's hurting....so buh bye till tomorow (if i manage to get internet excess... my mum has already paid the phone bill but the lembab telekom flers still hasn't reconected the line so i'm still depending on my mum's office computer till further notice)

writing book dilema

one of the reasons i'm not giving details on my holiday is because of the fact that i only wrote down my ideas and the basic skeleton story in my writing book and i had so many ideas that i finished the whole book....and all the stories i wrote in the period of my holiday just happens to be skeleton stories. so right now i'm looking for the perfect writing book and decided to get the same type of notebook like i had before only in a different design but the problem is....i cant find it anywhere!
and since i'm stubborn i have to find that particular book cuz its the only thing that is both practical and nice to look at.... i'm not materialistic but i would like to look at a notebook and actually FEEL like writing in it...that on of the weird things about me. there are plenty of weird things about me but for the purpose of this article i'll just keep it at that.
i'm flippin' out!!!!!!! my holiday must be published!

p.s did i mention i can be obsessive at times to?

holiday,holiday .....or hellday?

i got back from my holiday last sunday and couldn't find a computer with internet connection, since mine is fried...again and that i'll have to wait for my mum's friend to clear of the virus in my laptop and he's a doctor and so very busy... i think he's with the UN or something like that... he gets to travel often. Anyway, here's an outline of my 1 week holiday.

1st day

push of at eight in the morning to go to ipoh/perak ...not ipoh taiping..yet.
saw some sites
ate at ipoh club
set of to pinang
stayed the night with my mum's friend

2nd day
woke up early in the morning along with my mum's friend and her husband to go trekking
8.30am we started our trek and took 2 hours to reach our destination
once we got there me and my mum unpacked our tents (we were camping over at the beach)
we chilled out and met the most friendly flee ridden dog and tried to play fetch...sadly the dos was a bum
went over to the intersection where the fresh water stream met the ocean via beach.
hung out there and i tried to sneak a climb on the rocks nearby... my mum caught me a and as always panicked.
aunt and uncle left via boat

3rd day
got back to pinang via boat
checked into pinang club and took a bath to look human...or vaguely so
relaxed the whole day

4th day
took a 'becha' to fort cornwalis and took the same 'becha' (rickshaw...or resembling one) to the ferry station
went to the bird park there and got depressed ( the reason i promise will be reveled in later posts since i dont have the flash drive containing the picture of that sickening escapade)
got the ferry back home and took a taxi to the club
that nite we went to dinner with aunt and uncle along with aunt's mother (who has a tattoo on her right inner upper arm) and her nephews who were petrified i was a girl...but not as bad as a malay boy...they pretend i dont exist my mum says its hormones but i think its cuz they wanna seem macho.... it just seem to me that THEY'RE stupid... anyway, i had constipation which cut the dinner short.... by 30 minutes. went to penang swimming club to hurl and unblock the other end.
spent most of the nite in a karaoke booth at the swimming club.
went back to pinang club and slept like a log.

5th day

went back to ipoh...taiping at bukit larut and spent hari raya haji there with my grandma and pa as well as youngest aunt (they traveled from kajang and they dont live in taiping)
walked to the top of the hill with aunt and mum
hung out and slept

6th day
went back home to shah alam/ kajang

7th day
shoot of to melaka and that nite we went to jonker street in jonker walk (note jonker street ain't there if it ain't saturday nite)

8th day
went back home




there is more to the story..not to mention pictures and i left out the waterfall part at the very begining ...but i wanted to tell the whole story plus pictures....so watch out!

Friday, December 14, 2007

quotes and stuff

-is there ever right or wrong in a war?
the light sees the dark
yet the dark sees darkness in the light
some say war is the testing of might
they say the stronger wins
in a way that is true
in others its just the arogance of man
war is more of a battle of faith then of strength
for sometimes the week of heart and faith
and keen on darkness and deceit wins the battle of strength
yet those who are strong in faith for their cause
for those who were weak of heart
join the opposition


-some people fear death because of the ending of life,
yet some think life is not worth living because of death,
they are both wrong,
life is only meaningfull because of death
if life was endless there will be an end,
if life dies the world will still perish

-perfection is sought apon by the imperfect
yet the perfect do the same

-in a city, the buildings are big and impersonal
in a village, the buildings are small adn to personal

pick up lines for the dumb and the sick

these are toltaly stupid pick up lines that me and my friends have come up with that is both dissgusting and stupid..but hey! us girls do go crazy once in a while (except for me,i'm always crazy)

gal to guy

1. i love that shirt, where did you get it?

note: this line is ok...but not to be used when guy is in school uniform... you'll look dumb... yet some guys like that...

2.oh my god! you have such big muscles!

note: ewwwww..... cheap,whoreish and totaly ambarrasing!

3.hey are you single?... no? did i mention your gilfriend is a slut and she slept with my boyfriend/ yeah, she thinks we should trade boyfriends...so my name is...

note: this line will asure you a slap...or a punch...or a kick...or a. never mind.

4.no wonder you're so buff -this is said while starring at his lunch tray-

note:ain't that bad.... but darling he's buff cus he works out...its when you get fat that you eat a lot...go figure


guy-gal

1.you are so beautiful

note: this is both cheesy and it means crap when the guy is a playboy.

2.i'm sorry but i've got to go, this much treasure is sinful

note: is that an insult or a praise?

3. he's such a jerk for dumping you..

note:this is so sweet...but it means shit if he's oogling at your boobs or trying to feel up your ass... and if i were you i'll give him a kick in the groin and say "sorry its to small for my taste"
disgusting comment but worth a try.

4.let me show you how to 'swing' -while playing golf-

note:if you haven't caught on. he's saying that you're crap 'golf' and wants to show you how he 'swings' which is disgusting unless you're not muslim and he's your boyfriend.


okay thats it..i told you it's disgusting...

the loner,a fictional story based on my elders

there was once 3 sisterswho lived together yet apart. these girls prove that even if you all have spots it dosent mean you're alike. the eldest was...is a loner.she's so caught up in her own buisness that the hardly cared for mindless gossip except when it concerned her. she isn't selfish yet she loves being right.

the middle sister was an absolute CONTROL FREAK. she wants all to be to her liking and if it ain't she makes them do what she wants...or tries to.suprisingly she's married as her older sis is. her husband loves her to pieces and i think that she is very lucky...he cooks to!

anyway, the youngest sister is truly an oddity.she isn't married. she still lives with her parents and most of the time they are fighting...especialy her and her mother. she totally lacks the confidence that her sisters have. i dont blame her, at school she was always compared to her sisters and she never came close. you see she was stuborn as hell and the more you press her the more she resisted. so the more the teachers pushed,the more she resisted. until now, she still hasen't gained the confidence that she so lacked. no wonder, she still lives with her mother...i'm not saying thats a bad thing, but living with her mom she is still unable to break out of her high school shell... when asked,she says that she is looking for an apartment..i say hury the hell up!

her mother has given up on her but she still stabs poison darts without meaning to. i don't blame the mother for wanting the best fr her child, but she has to learn to love the way her child the way she is and stop trying to change her.in a way both the mom and the child are a fault in this...and they never talked about it to each other... thats a major problem.

the youngest cared to much about what people thought of her, that is what's preventing her from being her own person. people are all diffrent and have diffrent oppinions...if you try to hard to please all of them sooner than later you'll die... and maybe when you're on the journey up there you might finaly realise that the only oppinions that mattered are your own.

i grew up with the fear of becoming like this sister, but i realised that she is perfect the way she is and that i'll never be like her because know her mistakes that she told me herself and i realised that she didn't want me to be like her either. i know i wont but i will always have a part of her in me because the fear i felt was there because i recognised her in me... i am me yet i have a part of her in me to...maybe that's the reason i'm me and not her...

yeah yeah i know that's confusing.that is why god invented our brains...so that we use them... suprise! suprise!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

'emo's and hoppers

ok... i am going on holiday tomorow and i'm really exited....obviously. i'm going trekking,camping and also i'm goin to go to a famous ghost house... thats the part i dont get. if a haunted house is full of people or known by many people...wont the ghosts run away? i mean, imagine living in a house that is walked freely by a lot of people that you dont even know... i'll run away. who wants a bunch of strangers hang around while you take a bath? i don't
so i'm not really betting on seeing a ghost there.but the rented bunglo i'm gonna be sleeping in for 'hari raya haji' is more promising. but i wonder when i do finaly find a ghost...umm i mean a REAL ghost,not the ones you see on the road everyday, that is a diffrent species altogether. i mean a ghost GHOST i'll run or stay and chat.... you can learn a lot from an elderly person...imagine a elder GHOST. they can be dead for a thousand years...not quite millions...have you ever heard of a caveman ghost?
hehe, what a weird idea. maybe i'll find out how they discovered fire!
so anyway, the reason i wanted to write this in the first place is to tell you of this old and stupid movies i saw this week. the title is "clueless" and alicia silverstone acted as the main character.
in this stupid movie, she fell in love with a gorgeous gay guy. she was divastated when her besfriend's boyfriend pointed it out to her...i dont really blame her... looking at the typical guy these days...alicia said that she cant understand why we are expected to swoon over these guys (we meaning girls) i cant help but agree. ok here's the lowdown, these are the guys who wear baggy jeans low that we are treated to a view of their boxer clad behinds,caps that are facing backwards (since they come from the south....hello! you come from the east....i'm talkin' bout' asian guys here),eating chewing gum that sticks to their lips and make them drool. yeah!!! huh.....
i ain't gonna swoon to that. to tell you the truth all the guys want is to smack that. thinking that girls want egoistic guys...ooopppssss, think again. most of us like sensitive guys....eeerrrr not to sensitive. the guys are the ones who make the girls cry, not the other way around.
there are also the wannabe 'emo' group of malay guys... these are the one who pretend to be a punk. in other words, they wear lots of black eyeliner,listen to rock,wear black... hello, there is more to being an 'emo' than just the physical stuff. they listen to rock cuz they relate to the lyrics.... whereas,the wannabe malay guys listen to rock cuz they think its cool.
ok,enough from the obvious... i gotta go. again.bye.

Saturday, December 8, 2007

the waiting room

The waiting room


There is a strange thing about the waiting room in a hospital. First of all it has no geographical bearing… it just is. It can be anywhere in a hospital. Just as long as there are people waiting in it for the fate of their loved ones.

The second thing is that if you observe the surroundings of the room, wherever it may be, you might learn something new… if you haven’t already.

The waiting room is always full…or to the very least, occupied by people in vain for their loved ones to come out of an operation or worrisome mothers waiting for the verdict of her child’s running nose, this room is always the best or worst place to be, depending on the situation…

This room, can be the most dreaded destination for a doctor bearing the heavy burden of carrying bad news, yet at the same time, it could be the best place for the doctors to be when having tasted the sweet and addictive taste of victory. The taste that leaves the doctor wanting more of it…more victory.

The room itself is unremarkable. Indeed it could be a hallway. Yet what attracts me to this room is the people. And more so, the people and their love for other people who (unlike the waiters) are the ones who were unlucky enough to be carried far behind the swinging doors. The worry, the guilt, the love. This is where everyone put aside their differences and hope together that the one behind the swinging door will survive so that their guilt for having avoided the encounter with the door themselves would be relieved. So that they wont have to spend the remaining of their lives looking back at what they should have done or said to that person or even what they SHOULDN’T have done. That is what haunts the quiet majority of them…the guilt.
The survival.

I have only been to the waiting room once. I’m glad to say that the operation went well. And I didn’t have a close personal relationship with the man who undergo the operation. Nor with his daughter or wife…
But the daughter is my cousin. So I had to be there. And I chose to.
But not for the patient’s sake but for my own, more complicated sake.
I was disappointed. The person I DID want to see wasn’t there… but I DID get a starbucks’ sticker. That did make it lighter…

All in all. My story isn’t one that relates to the dramatic side of the waiting room. But sitting there with my relations and other people who actually had something to worry about. I mean, yes the person I was waiting for was in the operation theatre… but it wasn’t his first…
Cancer is kinda hard to get rid of once you get it.
So I knew I didn’t have that much to worry about. I didn’t worry but those close to him did… but that is only natural…

Saturday, November 24, 2007

the big make over

here are sum trully stupid pics of me on holiday.... and a make over not so good, and sum babyphat stuff that totally rocks...

first...... the items..








those are the pics of babyphat...not that i wear the items.but i still think they rock

ok,here's the pictures of me after the makeover.


oops... wrong picture...hehe





not me...that's my cousin....hooohhoooo


BEFORE





AFTER

i told ya it'll be diffrent


BEFORE




AFTER



the devil don have to wear prada to be this bitchy

ok so this is a picture that i REALLY couldn't do much with so i just cut out their faces... before you see the picture you must know that these two have studied marshal arts and the art of the matrix...in this picture you have them demonstrating their talents
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Wednesday, November 14, 2007

living in malaysia has its perks.... for example, the fact that there are four main races in our country... i'm not saying my country is devoid of racism... some of my people are the toughest racists around...not all mind you. but there are amongst us that refuse to take any other races into consideration....so it helps to be a mix of the nationalities...its the way to make SURE that you have an open mind.... there are of course pure bloods (of nationalities) that carry an open mind on their shoulders.... but not many and these people are the ones that i cherish and respect dearly...









these are the people who dont mind listening to music sung by these people


above is ms spears





mrs cristina


ms knowles




AND

Micheal Jackson


no offence to none of the singers above... i love them... including Micheal Jackson... i really dont believe that he did do what was said he did to that boy... i still enjoy his music..in fact when i was YOUNG i loved him and i still do...i mean he was...IS the inspiration of Chris Brown...that boy can dance his legs are everywhere....remind you of anyone? their style are different.

ok so the point of this article is..... if you dont have an open mind,there aint no good music...

stupidly comical but true...eh?


cuz face it...almost all of the video clips on mtv are of sex apeal and the sexy stuff.... so as a message to mothers with children under...i don know... maybe 11?

do lock your mtv chanel and hide the code in your sock...


as 4 the mothers of teenagers out there..... they are gonna know anyway. so whats the point?

lol. k, ms nuts is rollin outa here. ciou!


Tuesday, November 13, 2007

the 1st pic is of the yggdrasil tree made in the viking age,this photo is believed to show the yggdrasil tree with the god named Viðópnir.

this one is a copy of the illustration from the Ockelbo Runestone, 11th-century Sweden.

this is my fav, this illustration shows the a 19th century attempt to recreate the view of prose edda.....


i passed a cinema and noticed the poster advertizing beowulf.



so i read the book and there is this treet hat facinates me....its called yggdrasil.



the world ash tree, i have no idea why but the name sounds damned familiar...i still cant recall where i read the name...



so anyway, i googled "yggdrasil" and went into wikipedia this is what i found.....i copied the text.... this is only a snipet if you want the whole thing you google it urself!






In Norse mythology, Yggdrasil (Old Norse Yggdrasill, IPA: [ˈygˌdrasilː]; the extra -l is a nominative case marker) is the World Tree, a great ash tree located at the center of the universe and joining the nine worlds of Norse cosmology. The trunk of the tree may be thought of as forming a vertical axis around which these worlds are situated, with Ásgard, realm of the gods, at the top and the underworld realm of Niflheim at the bottom. Midgard, the world of mortals, is located in the middle and surrounded by Jötunheim, land of giants, both of which are separated by the ocean. Yggdrasil is also sometimes known as Mimameid or Laerad.......






and this






etymology and alternative names






The most commonly accepted etymology of the name is ygg "terrible" + drasil "steed". While the name means the "terrible steed", it is usually taken to mean the "steed of the the terrible one", with Yggr the epithet of the god Odin. In other words, Odin's horse, referring to the nine nights he is said to have spent hanging from the tree, or "riding the gallows", in order to acquire knowledge of the runes. The gallows are sometimes described in Old Norse poetry as the "horse of the hanged." In the case of "terrible steed", the association with Odin may be secondary, and any number of riders possible. A third interpretation, with etymological difficulties, is "yew-column", associating the tree with the Eihwaz rune ᛇ.
Fjölsvinnsmál, a poem in the Poetic Edda, refers to the World Tree as Mimameid (ON: Mímameiðr, "Mímir's tree" ). The tree is also probably identical to Laerad (ON: Læraðr) a tree whose leaves and branches reach down to the roof of Valhalla and provide food for the goat Heidrun (ON: Heiðrún) and the stag Eikthyrnir (ON: Eikþyrnir).


as an explanation to prose edda mentioned in the caption of the third picture....
this is what i found when i googled it

The Prose Edda, also known also as the Younger Edda or Snorri's Edda (Icelandic: Snorra Edda) is an Icelandic collection of poems containing many stories from Norse mythology. The work was written by the Icelandic scholar and historian Snorri Sturluson around 1220.
The Prose Edda opens with a Prologue and consists of three distinct books: the Gylfaginning (c 20,000 words), the Skáldskaparmál (c 50,000 words) and the Háttatal (c 20,000 words). Seven manuscripts, dating from around 1300 to around 1600, have independent textual value.
The purpose of the collection was to enable Icelandic poets and readers to understand the subtleties of alliterative verse and to grasp the meaning behind the many kennings that were used in skaldic poetry.
cool huh....
but thats not really what i'm most facinated by...that would be reserved to the legend of fenrir..... i bet those of you who read harry potter the 6th and 7th book would find that name familiar... the origin of that name is from the wolf that is bound by....a gods chains...the chains were helped in construction by the dwalves.this wolf was bound by these chains...but according to norse legend the wolf is gonna one day grow so big that the chain imprisoning him will break and when it does the wolf will devour odin in his hall to be killed by his son.. cool huh.
k i'll be off.....but this is my thought if the legend of Fenrir is when he DOES burst free from the chain he might be to old to attack ANYONE...... he'll be an old wolf...
k.... c ya


Thursday, November 1, 2007

memories

i remember when i was but friends with my ex. i remember i used to wonder who thought him how to speak and also (amongst other things) how he got his impressive knowledge of trivial stuff like how an engine works and what is the capital flower of a country...all the technical stuff... but now i notice that he is lacking knowledge in stuff like myths and legends...which i am imensely interested in... but i cant say i'm the master. anyway,when i asked him about it he'll answer "the internet" and i'd be damn anoyed with him...how the hell was i to know what site he visits? when i asked him he dident tell him which got me really mad.

the only thing he DID say that was the slightest bit usefull is the fact that he cant keep his moputh shut about his "alex rider" who is a fictional character in "the alex rider series" by Anthony Horowits... and i used to make fun of him all the time. take note that we were close friends by this time. i used to make fun of him about alot of things...i still do only now i tease him about girls... i love to hear his response...they were always anoying.

i stopped making fun of him when i picked up this book that i loved titled "evil star" and i didn't see the author's name...it was...is Anthony Horowits... that was a sock up my 'archloch' i got hooked... and i now own all of his books in exception or the diamond brother series. the alex rider series and the powere of five..
i've got
stormbreaker
pointblanc
skeleton key
eagle strike
skorpia
ark angel
and there is snakehead coming but it still hasent reached my country yet

thats the alex rider series

raven's gate
evil star
nightrise
and thats the power of five series

anyway,i blame him for my addiction to anthony horowitz and also for my love of harry potter...books.

i was in the bus with him (at this time i was 8)
a group were talking about harry potter so i went to to sit with them...
.......fact......
i was WAY less shy when i was 8
one of the girls talking was someone i knew and 2 years my senior
i thought they were talking about the movie which my mum didnt let me watch at the time because she thought it was a ghost movie...a movie about witchcraft that would give me nightmares for weeks.and that i was upset i didnt get to watch

there were a few people but i only remember the boy and the girl. so i sat down and joined the disscussion...of course i only knew half of what they were talking about...
then i endded up talking with the guy and i found out that harry potter the movie was actually a book....that was the time tat i found out that movies can actually be made based on books. i was a big fan of reading even then...and i was 8....i started reading harry potter....well at least i set my mind to convincing my mum to buy the book for me...... it was a year until i actually got around to buying it... talk about distracted.

after that i got hooked and now i'm caught in the net...
in the later years i endded up telling this guy that the latest book on the power of five series is now on the racks and to buy the adhorsens series and so on...

hehe serves him right..now i can actually outsmart him in the ranks...well about most things.
stuff like computers and the best mp3's and mp4's i still ask him...in fact he was the one who told me to download ares galaxy to download and upload my music... which saved my life cuz if i hadent downloaded the program i would be stuck listening to my mum's ballads and song that were famous 2 years ago...
thank god...he can still be a pain in the arse sometimes...most of the time.
but he has his uses...which is to anoy me and to perk me up when i'm in a foul mood...he's aboyut the only one who can do it in 2 seconds flat. much to the joy of my mum who desided not to confiscate my phone because of his cure. ge thank god!
memories help you realize what you neglect and what you do... they are good
but not always intirely...

this is an interview by teen reads.com about ONE of my fav writers...enjoy

INTERVIEW
April 13, 2006Markus Zusak is the award-winning author of four young adult novels: THE UNDERDOG, FIGHTING RUBEN WOLFE, GETTING THE GIRL and I AM THE MESSENGER. In this interview with Teenreads.com contributing writer Brian Farrey, Zusak discusses the appeal of reading and writing, and describes his experience in Germany while researching his latest novel, THE BOOK THIEF. He also addresses the similar threads that run through his work and even shares a poignant childhood memory.Teenreads.com: One of your greatest successes in THE BOOK THIEF was making Death a character with depth whose musings wax philosophical at nearly every turn. How much Markus Zusak is there in Death, and vice versa?
Markus Zusak: I guess there's a little bit of death in me, but it's probably true for everyone. I think I just applied the thought of how scared I am of death and reversed it. I thought, 'What if he or she or it is haunted by everything he sees humans do?' In that way, he's also like all of us, because we all have the same reactions to each other's behavior. Also, I had more empathy for Death when he was vulnerable like that.

TRC: In "The Word Shaker," the book-within-a-book in THE BOOK THIEF, Max weaves a parable for Liesel about the power of words to at once destroy and create. In the world today, who do you think is winning --- the people who use words to destroy or the word shakers?

MZ: What a question! Probably like always, it's pretty even, and the word shakers most likely feel lonelier because the destroyers are louder. Maybe the point is also that this is internal as well as external. We all have stories about ourselves that shame us, but also ones that give us the feeling that we're okay after all.

TRC: You traveled to Germany to do research for THE BOOK THIEF. What was that experience like? What did you take away that you didn't know before you started?

MZ: It was great. I humiliated myself sometimes when I spoke German (I'm pretty rough with it), but that's all part of the experience. It was great to simply walk around the streets where the book was set --- to see the river where I'd imagined Rudy jumping in to rescue Liesel's book. Research-wise, I found some things that were impossible to find in Australia, like certain records and annoying, hard-to-get trivial information. A good example was discovering the seasonal habits of apple trees, just in case someone out there would pick me up on a mistake. On a strange note, I did something a little sentimental, or superstitious...I carved Rudy and Liesel's names into a tree with a coin. It was at the river, and my fingers were really sore by the end of it. I wonder if the names are still there.

TRC: A common thread in all your books is respect and the characters who seek it. Ruben and Cameron. Ed Kennedy. Liesel and Max. All have varying degrees of success. Do you believe that the need for respect is a trait inherent in humans, and, if so, how have you seen that trait bring out the best and worst in your life?

MZ: I've never thought of the similarities between the books in that way, but I think I equate that idea with hunger. The Wolfe brothers are hungry to survive and prove themselves to the world and each other. Ed delivers people from one spiritual place and sense of self to another. And Liesel and Max show love and respect by sharing stories. As for myself, I only know that writing has given me that sense of self worth. Without writing and stories, I know I'd be miserable. I'm just lucky I decided early on what I wanted to do. Also --- and to finally answer the question now --- I think that a sense of respect is definitely inherent in humans. I guess we all want that kind of affirmation, from other people and from ourselves.

TRC: In a recent interview you said, "It's the little stories that define us, our existence." What's the littlest story you can tell about Markus Zusak that helps define you and your existence?

MZ: God --- these questions are incredible (in a good way)!One of my best memories of growing up is catching my first proper wave, surfing across it, with my brother cheering from the shore. My brother and I hated each other and loved each other, but that small memory shows me that we were really best friends.

TRC: How do the responses to your books from readers differ in Australia from the responses in the US? How are they similar?

MZ: I've actually noticed no differences at all. I just seem to get more responses from America, since it's a much bigger country.

TRC: Talk about your discipline as a writer. What routines/habits do you have for where you write, when you write, and how you write?

MZ: I try to write in the mornings, from about 7 till 11:30, then have a long break, then maybe do another few hours later in the afternoon. That changes towards the end of a book, when the hours become a lot longer. There's also a lazier routine, usually in summer, when I'm more likely to start work around 10 and move everything back. That's usually just because I picked up surfing again and go early in the mornings.

TRC: You've described THE BOOK THIEF as a challenge to write, taking nearly three years to complete. What sorts of writing challenges do you embrace? What challenges, if any, do you shy away from?

MZ: I'm basically a non-confrontational person. I shy away from blowing my horn at someone in the car (I think I've done it three times). I also agree with people rather than argue --- I can't help it. As for writing challenges, I don't know. I guess I shy away from writing certain genres. Fantasy. Crime, and so on. The challenge I take on is no different from any writer --- the doubt. Struggling to believe that the book is working is the greatest problem, but if it wasn't there, finishing a book wouldn't be the achievement that it is.

TRC: When you sit down to write, how much do you know about the story and the characters before you start, and how much of it comes from the process of experimentation while writing?

MZ: I generally have the start and the end first. Then I have other kinds of check points I want to go through. It's a bit like running a race, but once you've gone through each stage, you find that things will move around. You'll need to do certain parts up to a hundred times before you can move on. You might even find the end a little to the left or right than you originally planned. A good example of that is THE BOOK THIEF. Originally, Liesel was going to be arrested for book thievery, but when I made it to the end, it simply wasn't right.

TRC: THE BOOK THIEF is, among other things, a love letter to books, writing, and the power of words. What excites you when you write?

MZ: I love the idea that there can be one gem on every page of a book. It can be an image, an idea or a piece of dialogue --- anything. If there's one gem on every page of a hundred-page book, that's a hundred good reasons to read it.

TRC: What three elements does a book need in order to grab your attention as a reader? What are you reading these days that's making you take notice?

MZ: The first thing is the gems I just mentioned, the second would be story. While it's nice to have the gems, if the story doesn't captivate me, it makes finding the great images that little bit harder. Lastly, I think voice. Someone once told me that voice is everything, and they were probably right. If you can hear the characters or the narrator talking, they can almost tell you anything and you will go with them. I am currently reading the Australian classic, CLOUDSTREET, by Tim Winton. It is all of the things I've just mentioned.

TRC: Thanks so much for taking the time to talk to us! Final question: Can you tell us anything about what's up next for you?

MZ: I'm starting work on a new book now. I'm not sure how long it will take, but it's called BRIDGE OF CLAY. I'm afraid of it at the moment, but that's probably a good thing.Click here now to buy this book from Amazon.com.Click here to get the audiobook from Audible.com.-->
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Interview
Aussie newcomer Markus Zusak brings readers into the gritty and often violent world of dogfights and underground boxing matches in his new, semi-autobiographical novel, FIGHTING RUBEN WOLFE. Read on as Teenreads.com writer Tammy Currier chats with Zusak about his backyard boxing days, his unique writing style, and much more.

Teenreads: Where did the plot line for FIGHTING RUBEN WOLFE, your latest YA novel, come from? Is it autobiographical in any way?

MZ: The plot came directly from my characters. I started out with these two [larrikan] brothers from a struggling family at the dog track and took it from there. I usually find that once I have the characters in a strange situation, I might stumble over an entire story.As far as being autobiographical, it is my first book, THE UNDERDOG, that most resembles actual events in my life. In FIGHTING RUBEN WOLFE, it is generally the feel of it that is most autobiographical, especially the relationship between the brothers. That's my brother and me all over --- not giving each other an inch at home, but willing to die for each other in the world.Teenreads: If so, which of the brothers, Ruben or Cameron, do you relate to most?

MZ: I'm definitely closer to Cameron. His thoughts, concerns, and fears come from me. The only time a little bit of Rube comes out in me is when I have to perform in schools or writers' festivals. Like everyone, I like to prove myself once in a while.

Teenreads: Your depiction of amateur boxing was vivid and violent. How much research was involved?

MZ: To be honest, not much. I did enough fighting in my backyard with my brother and his friends when I was growing up! That was enough to give me what I needed for this book. I used to spend a lot of time walking around Sydney, and that was where I envisioned the fights taking place.

Teenreads: Have you done any boxing yourself?

MZ: Only in the backyard --- and being younger and smaller than my brother, he really used to beat the crap out of me... We only had the one pair of boxing gloves so we decided to have just one glove each. It was all a bit of fun, really, until we got caught. Being kids, though, we kept doing it. We had to.

Teenreads: FIGHTING RUBEN WOLFE is about much more than boxing. It's about identity, dignity, loyalty, and love. What, if anything, do you hope your readers will take away from this book?

MZ: In a way, I hope for a combination of things. I do hope they feel the themes of fighting for your own dignity when it seems to be stripped from you everywhere you go, longing to make yourself into something, as well as the themes of love (no matter how little it is shown) and loyalty. But I also hope that people notice the style of my writing --- the different imagery I use and the shortness of it. I'm most attracted to writing that can describe something without detail --- where few words can have a lot of impact. Last of all, I hope people can feel the combination of humor and struggle. I feel that it's not only determination that gets us through hardship, but laughter, too. If people can both laugh and be inspired, I feel like I've done a good job. But I can only hope...

Teenreads: You've stated that, as a teen, you had no idea what you wanted to be when you grew up but that you understood the importance of stories. Why are they so important? Entertainment aside, what purpose do they serve?

MZ: Stories have always told me where I was from. Both my parents were immigrants to Australia, and their hardships and struggle to live decent lives are probably the basis of everything I approach. Also, when I see my friends, we laugh and carry on, and it's our stories that give us that laughter. I guess without stories we'd be empty.

Teenreads: Becoming a writer was very important to you. When did you first set pen to paper?

MZ: I was 16 and my first book was an absolute shocker. Like with most things, it takes me a while to adjust and get it right, so it took me several attempts. By 18, I'd finally written a manuscript. For the next few years, I struggled with ideas, always starting but not believing in myself enough. Then I wrote my first published book, THE UNDERDOG, just for fun, and gradually it became more intense, and I had the combination I wanted --- humor and passion --- and it was published.

Teenreads: Are there any books or writers that were particularly important in your development as a writer?

MZ: My favorite writer is Roddy Doyle, who wrote the Barrytown Trilogy, but I'm also a big fan of Hemingway. An Australian book, MY BROTHER JACK, is also a favorite of mine. Mostly though, it's where I'm from and my working-class upbringing that has influenced me most.

Teenreads: What advice would you give to aspiring writers?

MZ: I was a writer for six years before I was ever published. Sometimes we get caught up in finding a publisher, but I guess the most important thing is to believe that what we're writing is being done because it's in us and deserves to be let out. The other thing I'll say is to laugh about it a bit. I'm happiest in my writing when I just relax and have a bit of fun. My biggest mistake, a lot of the time, is being too hard on myself.

Teenreads: How has writing changed your life?

MZ: Writing has given me a purpose. Stories are part of me now, and it's everything I want to be. It gives me a chance to talk in schools and share stories, and now that I've been published in the USA and in Europe, I'm hoping to travel more and just write, rather than work in other jobs as well.

Teenreads: And finally, are you working on anything now? If so, can we get a sneak preview?

MZ: I just finished the last book in the Wolfe trilogy. It's called WHEN DOGS CRY and centers on Cameron Wolfe's desire to treat a girl right. There are beer iceblocks, girls, kindhearted barbers who can't cut hair at all, crowded train rides, a sticky situation between Cameron and Rube, and Cameron's final stand for himself and his brotherhood with Rube. --- Interviewed by Tammy L. CurrierBack to top.
INTERVIEW
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Tuesday, October 30, 2007

the newest thing..and some old things

bottom me n my mum....dont really know what we're doing...

pic of me n my aunt looking blur/serious






have i told you a bout my holiday in frazer"s hill?




i dont think so...but i think i posted it on my last three blogs (which i deleted) anyway,here are some pics...






above is the nice looking house and my mum's inability to diffrent shape my front from my behind.
gatal cat huh? i have to tell you guys that it's male...n no, he wasn't tame...which explains a lot...





the cat in question is probably the fattest thing in the horse ring....apart from the guy who sells the tickets for the ride.


dont look at me look at the flowers behind me.

so you've seen the pics and laughed at them....now let me tell you about the horses that i saw in this stable i went to in frazer's hill. the horses were and ARE bone thin.i could see their ribs and feel them when i rode the horse but i didnt realize how patheticly thin they were until i saw the photos that my mum took....its to sad for me to look at and post online (either that or i'm just lazy) but i'll try and look for the pic on my computer...cuz now i'm using the computer in mu mum's office...well not HER office...the place that she works at.. WAIT hold on....
there thats my mum's blog. she's doing better than me... great..overthrown by my own mother...HOW AMBARRASING IS THAT? well whatever i dont really care. the article is " my frazer's hill escapade" i bet u'll find it damn funny.. and why not? she reads oscar wilde books....that is about the ONLY type of book that she will be able to finish in one try...normally with her other books she reads half then stop reading to start with another... then a couple of years later she picks it up again to read the other half...and for most cases you can bet she dosent remember the first half so the whole proses starts again... i really dont get that..... do you? hhhmmmmm.

truth?

People think they know me but what makes them think so?
Is it the way I walk?
The way I talk?
The way I carry myself?
Well…if they think they know me by my body language
Then it must be sending the wrong messages.
Because no one really knows me…
Sometimes I wonder if I really know myself…
All they have to do is look…and see…. and understand themselves for only then can they see everyone else…for what they really and truly are
Why do you think there are surprises?
Because no one knows anyone else fully
We even surprise ourselves sometimes...
So why do people judge?
Why do they pretend to know someone?
They kid themselves into thinking this is a predictable world
People think they know me but they don’t
They judge what is on the outside and never pause to look inside
They stick by their first impressions and that blinds them to everything else
They think that everyone is like them…
Empty on the inside so they try and make it up on the outside with cute shoes…
Not that I have anything against cute shoes and rockin’ material stuff I am a girl
But you’ve got to be pretty on the inside as well as on the outside
It’s important to think more than your exterior
It’s like a house
When you look at it on the outside its pretty,
Then you look on the inside, empty, devoid of anything personal
All you see is metal this metal that…no pictures… no memories
It’s unwelcoming
So, it’s the same with me.
Only they don’t judge me on the inside…they look on the outside
They see a shallow girl who loves to dress up…like them.
They think that by the style of my hair that I’m one of those material types
They don’t bother to see ME
They never once thought that I could be more than what they judged and convinced themselves that I am
Why is it that they don’t
I know the answer
It’s so simple that you could laugh…
They don’t know themselves...
They haven’t discovered themselves fully
Haven’t realized that looks ain’t everything
That they don’t know everything
That the biggest surprises are within themselves
I don’t think anyone really knows themselves fully

what?

what?what?what?

Well first of all I now have a blocked sim card…I have no idea what sim card stands for but apparently mine is not able to be unblocked…so I have to make a new one since I refused to get a new number…. Like I would ever give up my beautiful number for a common one…. no way ever in living daylights! To many boys know that number not to mention a few people that I’m not gonna see again!
Gals from my track and field competitions that wont come back next year...
2 ex boyfriends and my ex best friend’s stalker.
MIA on the last one…thank god! I had a stalker once and he was a pain…
But I think he stalked me because he wanted to annoy me not because he had a crush on me…. I don’t really know if that is bad or good..Lol
I guess its more good than bad. I don’t want a lovesick puppy dog following me with his tail wagging… it’ll be nice to but an ultimate pain in the ass all the same.

Anyway, back to the original topic, my phone. So far I’ve gone 1 week without my phone and I’m kinnda enjoying the peace and quiet. I’ll have to replace the sim card this Saturday so I’ll have around 4 days more without my phone. It happened like this.

My mum drowned her phone so she used mine and I used my old…totally cheapskate phone. In this old phone I activated the pin code…when that happened the phone asked for my PUK code, and I stupidly put in my password multiple times since I didn’t know what in the living daylights a PUK code is… I put in my passwords repeatedly until my SIM card got rejected.
My mum has now gotten her dream phone after the whole entire Malaysia ran out of stock of the nokia 6110 gps navigator phone, she is now the proud owner of an Nokia Nseries model N95…. And I’m stuck with a phone that can not function… the only good thing here is that I now know what a PUK code is and I don’t have my annoying ex at my tail…to make it worse, did you know that my ex (my 2nd ex) is actually my BGF’s (best girlfriend) cousin. Talk about stupid on my half.

Despite all this I’ve enjoyed today. Probably because I’ve been in school for the first time in 2 weeks. And since its after final exams we can do anything we want… so I had fun.
Fuzzy painted my nails with the new nail pen I bought. Now don’t go thinking I’m a girly girl now. I made sure all of them had black painted on. And the designs are rocker chick meets sassy bitch. I offered to direct the choral speaking for our interclass competition. And be coach for our class netball team… so I was pretty bz. But in my free time I sang and danced with the gang… and I mean dance while singing in front of the class. No teacher entered and not many students were there but even if they were the gang wont really care. We rock like no bodies business!

Thursday, September 27, 2007

couple versus bestfriend

i was listening to the radio this morning where these guys were asking everyone to call in and tell them who they would tell their secrets...your best mate or your..well...mate (as in couple as in girlfriend boyfriend) kinnda mate..
this girl called in and said her mate..when the guys asked why she said because is her bestfriend..
from personal experience i think it isent wise to couple with your best friend..
its like putting your king and queen on the same rank on a chess board.
then your opponent puts a rook (a castle) in between the queen and the king with another rook backing it up..
you are forced to move your king because it is more important and the rook eats your queen.
if you dont get it:-
the king represents couple
the queen represents best mate
the rank means 'the same track'
the castle in an obtacle

so what i'm trying to say is (if you still havent gotten the metaphor) is when you couple with your bestfriend when you break up you wont have your bestfriend OR your couple..

it hapened to me..
i broke up with my bestfriend and now he is my ex
now we still talk but we arent that close to each other as before..
a sob story huh?
nah,it was in the beginning but now i'm stronger and i know not to mix friendship wit relashionships..
i learned my lesson the hard way.since the guy in question is probably reading this..i wanna thank him for making me stronger...and that i still think he's ladies skills stink.

i suppose it would only work out if you were married (something i am not about to do...for about...10 to 15 years)
i guess if your husband or wife is your bestfriend then that will work...unless you divorce...
that's wwwwwaaaaaayyyyy outta topic.
but i guess if they do divorce then it'll be wwwwaaaaayyyy more painful then if you broke up with your boyfriend(or girlfriend)

ok..dont be best friends with your couple or husband (or wife..as if any older married people would read my blog)...its like puttin all your heart in a blender...
its...very nearly...suicide
but i got out all right...
in fact i'm STRONGER then yesterday (yes i listened to britney when i broke up..i confess)

couple versus bestfriend

isent it weird?

aint it weird when you get a haircut that everyone starts noticing?
like i yelled 'look look! my hair!'
and sudenly everyone wont leave you alone?
as if they are starving about things to talk about and start talking about hair...your hair..
god help us...why does everyone wants to criticise?
GUYS!!!! i dont care what you think of my hair!
what i do care about is you shutting your TRAPS!
cant you do that?
for 2 seconds?
just 2 seconds...SHUT UP! i gotta study for my exam and all you can talk about is my hair!!
there you go....i got it out...
now...
i've gotten that put i can now compose my first blog entry.
hi!
i was recently having an exam in my class.
it was raining pretty heavily..
i was done with my paper and i checked it twice..
so i looked out the window and saw this huge tree...
its ripling leaves looked beautiful and the occational lightning strikes illuminated the surface and darkened the depths of the tree..
i wondered what animals hid in the depths of the tree, waiting for danger to pass..
it reminded me of people...
how they hide in the shadows when all goes wrong and come out when sunshine shines
i guess its human nature but it interested me anyway...
some of you might find this boaring..if you do you might as well scoot..
anyway,why is it in times of trouble we hide and save ourselves?
not all of us...but most
why dont we face it and let it make us stronger?
instead they hide and save themselves from any risk?
to me this is stupid.
you always have to take a risk when challenge comes along...
or else what the hell's the point?
you have got to stay strong and face the problem but you have to be flexible to...
its like how in a storm a weed survives from collapsing while the stiff oak goes timber..
the weed bends itself with the wind and yet at the same time it stands its ground...
get the metaphor?
good...now ask yourself...
would you wanna be a weed or an oak tree?
if you answered oak....
you are the biggest idot in the world...
first an idiot because you read this blog.....
the biggest idiot because you chose to read this till the end...
three cheers for yourself...
lol